Mothers' sufferings

My co-columnists have shown how much suffering a mother goes through when her son is charged with having committed a grievous act. She is caught between a rock and a hard place: she wants to turn him in if evidence shows that he indeed has violated the law; but for love of him, she wants to protect him, to shield him from the law even, and tell the world that he is not capable of wrongdoing.

The media have been featuring Marlene Aguilar Ivler, mother of Jason Aguilar Ivler, who is alleged to have shot dead Renato Victor Ebarle Jr., son of a Malacañang official during a traffic altercation (road rage is how people call it these days) in Quezon City last year. Jason evaded arrest by law enforcers for several months. The other day, he was tracked down to his mother’s house, and after a shootout with NBI agents, he was wounded and taken to a hospital in Quezon City.

The media showed a distraught mother claiming her son’s innocence. She was smiling from time to time, and even winked, as she was being interviewed on television. One remembers that last year, when she was first informed of her son’s culpability and agents asked her about his whereabouts, she said something like, son, if you are guilty, wherever you are, please come home and surrender.

But she was singing a different tune this time, as she declared that if she had a thousand lives, she would give them all for her son. She said during the televised interview that he could not possibly kill another person, and she did not say anything when told that the slugs recovered from the body and the Toyota Land Cruiser of Renato Ebarle Jr. and a slug recovered from her house came from the same pistol recovered from her son Jason when NBI agents arrested him.

Marlene would defend her son to the death — the son who had been charged with murder for the killing of Ebarle and a separate homicide through reckless imprudence for the death of presidential adviser Nestor Ponce during a traffic accident in August 2004. Jason has now two standing arrest warrants in connection with the two cases. And Marlene herself is now facing charges of obstruction of justice for harboring an accused person and for refusing to report to authorities her son’s presence in her house.

Someone texted me yesterday about the media writing about Jason’s grief. What about Renato Ebarle’s mother’s grief, why don’t we write about that, too? A search through the Internet revealed nothing about Mrs. Ebarle, only about her husband, who expressed relief over the arrest of his son’s alleged killer.

Yes, we realize how painful it had been for Mrs. Ebarle, and Mrs. Ponce, to accept the death of their sons — presumably from the same killer. Not even the arrest of the murderer would soothe their aching hearts. They had brought them into this world, raised them with love and care, hopes and dreams which were shattered upon their demise.

I grieve not for Mrs. Ivler, but for Mrs. Ebarle and Mrs. Ponce, and for all mothers — and fathers — whose children are felled by bullets from the guns of heartless criminals.

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That question on the minds of all mothers is — how would you react if your son had been charged with murder, would you turn him in? The five female senatorial candidates at the Bulong Pulungan sa Sofitel Philippine Plaza Hotel Tuesday were asked that question, and they all said they wished they would not face such a predicament, but yes, they would have to turn in their sons. Incumbent Sen. Pia Cayetano, who is seeking another term under the banner of the Nacionalista Party, spoke about the importance of mothers having dialogues with their children, and her hope that her good relationship with her daughters would continue.

With Pia were two other Nacionalista Party candidates — Rep. Liza Maza, and Gwen Pimentel. Also at the forum were LP candidates Rep. Rissa Hontiveros and Yasmin Busran Lao; the other LP woman candidate, Sonia Roco, could not make it to the session.

Each one present talked about their programs, and how their struggle for national legislative seats has to deal with their gender, our society being male-governance-oriented. Yasmin Lao of Marawi City, said her agenda calls for the aspirations for peace and justice to be shared by Muslims and Christians alike. Yasmin, an articulate woman in her late 30s, founded the Al-Mujadillah Development Foundation precisely to deal with questions about oppressive practices.

Liza Maza’s strength of will and purpose she inherited from her mother, who told her that had she been born earlier, she would have not just joined Gabriela, Liza’s militant women’s organization, but headed it. Liza is a strong supporter of the reproductive health bill. She is a guest candidate of the NP, with Rep. Satur Ocampo, both of them confident of being voted to the Senate through the network of the Makabayan Coalition Party composed of Bayan Muna and allied party-list groups which voted them in the last election.

Rep. Rizza Hontiveros was the most anti-Arroyo of the forum guests, saying that the President has done “a disservice to the idea of women’s leadership.” Her main advocacy in Congress has been health care.

Gwen Pimentel, daughter of Sen. Aquilino “Nene” Pimentel Jr., started becoming politicized at an early age, as she grew up seeing her father arrested several times and taken from one military camp to another “because of his principles.” Now she is running for the Senate to continue her father’s legislative drive, her chief concern the welfare of children. She heads the Association of Child-caring Agencies, a coalition of orphanages and shelters, and has written a book on more practical system of adopting children.

 There are two other women vying for senatorial seats - Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago and Susan “Toots” Ople. If all the eight women candidates make it in the elections in May, they would be working - in the words of Pia Cayetano, “not to dominate men, but simply (for) equality.”

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