Names that fall short and double dead cars

Once upon a time when men still believed in vision and prophecy, people gave names not just to identify families and properties but also to set a mark, speak a future, or declare a purpose or destiny.

Luis for instance was from Luig or Ludwig, said to be the name of German warriors. Hannah was the mother of prophets, Gloria is for the Glory of God.

Names were used to carry on with the lineage, the character, or the profession. Even the name of one’s town somehow reflected some skill, historical significance, or character trait. Factual or generalized.

For decades, certain craftsmen, cooks, artisans were known by family names or town names. Lumanog for guitars, Puyat for furniture, Reyes for food.

In short when asked "what’s in a name?", clearly a lot.

The point came home when Pag-asa named the super typhoon Milenyo. It typified great size or special time. Sadly very few realized the environmental catastrophe that "Milenyo" left us.

Without a doubt our temperature reading will rise next summer, the air quality will be affected because this particular typhoon took down hundreds if not thousands of trees.

In the next two to three years we will learn what the millennium typhoon really did to the Philippines.

If Milenyo speaks of SIZE relative to time, I really wonder about company names relative to their state of affairs. After 10 days Sky Cable finally got their services back. To be fair, they suffered a lot of damage so we all try to be patient.

But hey, should they really use the name Sky Cable? I mean SKY is suppose to be ordinarily unreachable expanse not accessible to mere human reach.

The cables of Sky are so low that any high jumping rookie in the PBA or an average player in the NBA could use the Sky Cable lines for chin up exercises.

A lot of people wonder how on earth PLDT and Sky Cable can get away with such improper height clearance for their cables and why these companies don’t raise their black spaghettis?

What I saw during the post typhoon clean up may be the answer.

A service provider of the cable company was using an ordinary ladder made in the shop or what we use to call an electrician’s ladder.

No fancy buckets on a crane, no electric ladder, just a plain old aluminum ladder. Of course to do this all your cables have to be within a reachable height!

Perhaps we can suggest a more accurate name such as "Sly Cable". Never beyond your reach!

PLDT or the Professional Landscape Deterioration Team on the other hand could get the Urban jungle award for successfully making Metro Manila look like a jungle with all its dirty cables.

A recent addition to these "misnomers" is the once professional example of banking in Hong Kong. The bank was so good a friend carried on banking with them in the Philippines when he set up shop about 20 years ago.

Somehow things have changed for sub-STANDARD & CHATTER Bank. They’re so bad they don’t even know about time differences between the Philippines and Germany.

After being advised NOT to call a client before 3 p.m. Manila time, some overly zealous staff called him at 3:30 a.m. German time!!! Of course the clients’ local associates got hell.

If that’s not goofy enough for you, imagine being listed in their PRIORITY banking, dealing with them for seven years by phone where they check and get your approval for fund releases. And then one day you decide to go to the bank to get the payroll yourself and then being told sorry . . . we don’t know if you’re authorized!

Sadly before taking up this complaint with their Corporate PR, they even thanked me for helping and being fair when they were being placed on the rack during a Senate hearing. A week later it seems their people have changed telephone numbers or lost their phones!

10 DAYS LATER no money, no payroll, NO PRIORITY.

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In the course of a late dinner with CATS Motors CEO Felix Ang and veteran sportscaster Emy Arcilla, the talk expectedly drifted to business and cars.

What came out was quite an interesting exposition on why the automotive industry is hurting. Contrary to knee jerk analysis, we jointly concluded that if the automotive industry is to improve its sales it has to lobby hard for certain changes.

To begin with, we have to put a stop to the resale of DOUBLE DEAD vehicles. What we refer to are cars that figure in serious accidents, qualified as "Totally Damaged" and fully paid for by the insurance companies.

How would you feel if you found out months or years later that you actually bought a car that was buried in lahar, or drowned during typhoon Milenyo, or was an ex rally car or an Extacy as in EX Taxi?

Would you be happy to find out that your car has a somewhat biblical past as in it was called back to life (just like Lazarus) after a hideous accident! Or you have the car of Fred Flintstone, a survivor of a landslide?

In Europe such cars are automatically removed from the system, by cutting off the engine block number and chassis number. They cannot be repaired, restored or reused as an operating vehicle. They end up as a parts car.

Government has to set the standard or copy international safety sandards that determine what extent of damage can be repaired, replaced or declared totaled.

In the Philippines, this is often determined by the company adjuster who can either side with the insurance company at the risk of the motorist or side with the motorist based on pity or bribe which would then hurt the insurance company.

In one instance I actually saw a perfectly fine 2 door Alfa Romeo in Holland that had an electrical fire under the dashboard. Had this car been rewired, there was no guarantee if a second fire would happen or if its advanced electronics would just shut down on the expressway and cause a major accident.

I was prevented from buying it as junk and shipping it to Manila because the Dutch authorities require the companies involved to DESTROY the only possible means of registering such a car.

Unfortunately in the Philippines, it seems nothing is being done by government or by the manufacturers to prevent this recycling of truly accident involved and damaged vehicles. The insurance companies many of whom have "shops" or talyers simply take the cars or trucks and rebuild them.

Others just put an ad in the papers and sell them "As is – where is". Only God and the double dead dealing salesman know otherwise.

Another major problem in the Philippines is the absence of scientifically determined industry mandated blue book system which more or less helps buyers and sellers to correctly price vehicles. We Filipinos tend to overprice or overvalue used goods.

We don’t have a general understanding of depreciation and we certainly don’t appreciate the buyers’ perspective on why we still want dealership prices for cars that’s left the store 2 years ago.

Prices stay up because of emotionally determined rates, artificial pricing of used car agents who automatically remove 10 to 15 percent when you haggle so they can make the sale. In other words it was a trap.

Perhaps it’s time for Elizabeth Lee and Kampi to work on the blue book, how to maximize sale and stay out of resale, and get banks to come up with friendlier terms similar to what the electronics manufacturers and dealers have done.

Twenty years ago the best deal in town was 6 to 12 months to pay with interest. Now you can get that flat screens and Plasma TV 24 months to pay with 0 interest.

The only way to stop smuggling is to make it pointless. Most of my friends no longer buy electronics in Hong Kong because they get a better deal or ideal service. By giving international models and same features, by reducing downstream profiteers and duplicating electronics industry, life can be better for us all.