Now for the slow count

My fingernail is still blue-black from voter’s ink, so at least I’m sure they used indelible ink in my city. But I nearly backed out from voting yesterday. First I learned that my polling place had been transferred to another school about three kilometers away. When I finally got there, volunteers of the Parish Pastoral Council for Responsible Voting couldn’t find my name on their list.

In previous years I would have considered myself disenfranchised and simply left – it happened to me once when I was still a voter in Manila. What’s one vote anyway? It’s not even a presidential election.

But maybe it’s age, and the thought of the taxes I’ve paid over the years being misspent by the inept or pocketed by the corrupt. For the first time, I wanted my vote to count in what I think will be a close fight. If the usual clowns get elected, I want to have the right to say, "Don’t look at me, I didn’t vote for them."

So I clung to my voter’s ID that’s starting to look like crumpled tissue paper, ready to raise hell if my name wasn’t found. It was noon on a hot and windless day, and the polling booths were crammed into a tiny school compound. After a long search I was referred to another group where my name was finally found. Half an hour later, I had voted.

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Now comes the slowest vote count in the free world. It was disheartening to hear TV anchors late yesterday afternoon repeating the figures gathered so far from the field: 18 votes for this candidate, 24 for that… Four hours after the polling centers closed, the unofficial count had tallied less than 22,000 ballots.

Filipinos are gaining notoriety for impatience. When we don’t like our leaders, we throw them out (or at least try to) through people power. Imagine how everyone feels waiting for the official count to get past the first million ballots, when a trend can truly be established. How many days before this happens?

Those behind the failure to bring the Philippine electoral system up to 21st century standards should be the butt of nasty text jokes for the next three years. In the volatile political situation, the agonizingly slow count can trigger more violence and further inflame passions.

When will we ever get official poll results within 24 hours? In the age of cyberspace, we’re moving at snail’s pace. Our voting system, so crucial for a strong demo-cracy, is stuck in the prehistoric age. In Britain, Tony Blair knew he had won as prime minister and his predecessor was out of the official residence within 24 hours after the polling centers closed.

Such brutal efficiency in a peaceful transfer of power won’t happen here for at least two generations. But surely we can be a bit more efficient in tallying votes. Instead of three weeks of slow counting, why can’t we have just one? The sight of votes being laboriously tallied on big boards with pentel pen can make you weep. The world was supposed to embark on a space odyssey by 2001. This looks more like Jurassic Park.

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Another atrocity that will result from the slow count is that we’ll be hearing more from the propaganda chiefs of the two coalitions. I don’t know about you, but I’m up to my neck with statements from Crispin Remulla, Ronnie Puno and even Dodie Limcaoco. Maybe pugnacity is a requirement for the job of spokesman.

When this is all over – if ever this will be over – I want to go somewhere without Philippine politics to ruin my day. Everything has taken a back seat to politics for too long. Politics has become a favorite form of Pinoy entertainment. It’s like a soap opera – no matter how cheesy and sappy, people always stand by for the next episode. No plot is too incredible, probably because this is a land where magic realism isn’t confined to novels but happen in real life.

Yesterday, as the figures started trickling in from the exit polls, people in our office were reacting passionately to the names of those with an early lead. One common comment: How can Pinoy voters be so stupid? I don’t know if they were referring to those who voted for the administration or opposition candidates. But many were riveted to the screen as if they were watching a world boxing championship. They laughed and shrugged when told that not even one percent of the votes had been tallied.

Hey, it’s a free country, we can heckle anyone on TV. And don’t worry, we’re in for a long, slow count. Plenty of time to cheer and jeer. Let’s just hope the jeering doesn’t degenerate into violence.