Hannah Montana! The Jonas Brothers! Demi Lovato! Drake and Josh! You see them 24/7 on your favorite exploitanment channels. Now, get ready to see them in your favorite malls as well.
Word has it SM Department Stores have stocked themselves with the latest in tweendom. Their words: “We have preppie plaids, skirts and cardigans, hot hoodies, graphic tees, skinny jeans, jewel toned tops, and shrugs!”
Uh oh. Parents, reach for your pockets.
Every girl and boy’s must-haves are now can-haves, too. Pretty soon, every high school party in this country will have a 99.9% chance of having a Hannah-like ghel in it, holding hands with one of the Jonah Brothers. (Yes, I said Jonah Brothers.)
But that isn’t too much of a problem, is it? At least it isn’t Jamie Lynn Spears they're dressing up as. (If this is the case, moms and dads, be concerned.)
For the most part, the Me Generation is a crop of responsible, driven, and ambitious people. Playtime, parties, gigs, and gang meets — they’re all good, clean fun. So, here are a few Supreme tips for you Disney doters. Girls, we do not want you going out looking like a bad Demi Lovato impression. And guys, we do not want you to go out looking like the obese version of Drake and Josh’s Josh.
Be a poser
It is a fact that there will be cameras at any social function you attend. To prepare for this, use a mirror to find out what your best angle is, and stick to it.
The pouty-face look is out. And keep in mind that your pictures will be put on Multiply — so do not do anything your parents do not approve of. (Meaning, ask for a list of people you may kiss.)
If you are caught off-guard by some cameraphone-toting person, do not fret. (That’ll look bad.) You may always resort to the following poses:
• For guys: Stare straight at the camera with a general look of disinterest. Take your two thumbs and shove them into your pockets — but only your thumbs! Wait for the flash.
• For girls: Check your bangs. Tilt towards your best side. Take your two hands, extend your index fingers, lift your thumbs, and pretend you are gunning down losers in the party. Smile. Show your teeth. Wait for the flash.
Demand chivalry
Contrary to popular opinion, chivalry is not dead. In this photo, we see a guy getting ready to help his girl friend jump over a fence.
Then again, he may just be down to wipe the spots off his shoes. But hey, at least it's not the girl who’s bending over.
Stimulate yourselves
It is always a good idea to start a few intellectual conversations when you’re out with friends. This shows them you are to be taken seriously.
It also shows them your wonderfully-practiced “thinking” expression (take your dominant hand and rest it on your chin).
Here are some good discussion-starters. “Hey, like, isn’t that Selena Gomez so... omg? Did you like, watch the Discovery Channel?” And, “Omg, do you have David Archuleta’s album yet? Like, you should get it cause like, omg, piracy totally sucks.”
Also, promote world peace. See below.