Early start positive discipline at home

CEBU, Philippines - Positive discipline means guiding children's behavior by understanding children's emotional and psychological needs for belonging, acceptance, security, and respect. It is child-centric and the parent's role is that of mentor and guide. It involves reinforcing good choices and giving logical consequences for poor choices. Its focus is on developing understanding and responsibility in the long term rather than immediate obedience and compliance. 

Below are some tips for helping to set up an environment that encourages good behavior.

Preventing Misbehavior: Setting a Positive Environment

1. Be a model. Children learn how to behave by copying the adults around them. Children will react the way a parent reacts. They will speak the way a parent speaks. If a parent behaves in unacceptable ways, children can be expected to do the same. If a child is constantly misbehaving, most times it is because they see similar behavior at home.

2. Set appropriate expectations. Make sure you're not expecting too much from a young (0- to 3-year-old) child. For example, it is normal for young toddlers to make a mess while they are eating, because motor control and table manners take time to master. For older children, clearly explain the preferred behavior and make sure your child understands what you expect of them. Repeat often.

3. Develop a routine. Children thrive when they know what is expected of them and their day has a similar pattern to it. Children feel safe when they know the order of events and can predict what will happen next. This is the same with reactions to children's behavior. The child needs to know what the adults' reaction will be and that it will be fair and consistent.

4. Involve your child in making rules for the family. When a child is involved in making the rules, s/he will develop an understanding of why there are rules and how these help make the environment better.

5. Tell or show children the behavior you do want rather than punishing them for behavior you don't want. Young children need and look for approval from their parents and caregivers. To encourage good behavior clearly communicate what is expected of them and recognize them when they comply.

In the next article, we will discuss ways to respond to children's misbehavior that will lead to good behavior in the long run.

Sources: Naker, D. and Sekitoleko, D., Positive Discipline: Alternatives to Corporal Punishment www.raisingvoices.org

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The FREEMAN and the Ramon Aboitiz Foundation Inc. is running weekly features on Early Childhood Care and Development to emphasize the importance of Early Childhood Care and Development (ECCD) and to increase public support for ECCD.