Why teachers grow old prematurely

These are reported to be actual test answers from various schools in the Huntsville, Alabama metropolitan area:

Q: Name the four seasons.

A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: How is dew formed?

A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?

A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.

A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?

A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized?

A: The body is consisted into three parts – the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the fibula?

A: A small lie.

Q: What does “varicose” mean?

A: Nearby. Probably meant: “Very close.”

Q: Give the meaning of the term “Caesarean Section.”

A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

Q: What is a seizure?

A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a terminal illness?

A: When you are sick at the airport. There seems to be a semblance of truth in this answer. 

This one is my personal favorite.

Q: What does the word “benign” mean?

A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

You always hear people (especially politicians) say that teaching is the noblest profession. People say it so often, it falls on deaf ears – especially those of the teachers. These days, this cliché produces little or no effect on them. So I’d like to say something different. I say, teachers are the most powerful people in the world. Who else can command so much power as to tell 200 people when exactly they can go to the toilet?

A schoolteacher was given a ticket for driving through a red light.

When she appeared in traffic court, she asked the judge for immediate attention to her case as she was due to be back in class.

The judge looked at her sternly and said, “So you’re a schoolteacher. I am about to realize a lifelong ambition. You sit down at that table over there and write ‘I went through a stop sign.’ FIVE HUNDRED TIMES!”

It’s not easy to be a teacher. They grow old prematurely especially when they have students like me.

You and I should honor and pay tribute to teachers even when Teacher’s Day is long gone.

Teachers are my favorite audience. I have been giving talks to teachers and enjoying every moment with them. This is my way of paying tribute and giving back to them what they had given me.

Let’s support them and encourage our teachers. A little encouragement, a little note can actually prevent them from burning out.

Here are the top six signs your teacher is experiencing burnout: (source unknown)

1. Her spelling test words include “go”, “home”, “already”.

2. She spends an inordinate amount of time during every parent-teacher conference extolling the virtues of home-schooling.

3. Lately, all the math homework has involved calculating how long it will take her on Flight 201 to fly from Manila to Hawaii.

4. She proposes, “Because the scalpel method is much too slow, we’re going to speed up the frog dissection with this blender.”

5. You hear your kindergartener singing, “A-B-C-D, E-whatever, whatever…”

6. Your son comes home with a report card comment that reads, “Johnny is a snot-nosed brat, just like the other 23 losers in his class!”

Teaching is noble because God has given teachers the calling.

It was a teacher who encouraged me to shoot for the stars at a time when I was feeling sorry for myself. I have long forgotten what she has taught me, but I could never forget how she’s molded me.

If you happen to know teachers, extend your gratitude and encouragement to them. They deserve it.

 (Develop your leadership skills with Francis Kong this Oct. 26-27 at the EDSA Shangri-La Hotel. Call Pam or Kriselle of Inspire Leadership Consultancy Inc. at 632-6872614 or 09178511115 for further details.)