Reconciliation, not retribution

Now that Nonito Donaire Jr. is on top of the world, he gains a different perspective on what’s going on below. He’s in a position where he shouldn’t go down to the level of those who mud-sling, peddle lies and destroy reputations. As the newly crowned WBC/WBO bantamweight champion, Donaire can show he’s the bigger person than anyone who talks crap.

Over a month before his fight against Fernando Montiel, Donaire’s mother Imelda went public in chastising her son for allegedly not paying attention to his parents, two brothers and sister. She had just come from an all-expenses-paid Tokyo holiday, courtesy of Donaire, and caught everyone by surprise with her scathing commentary. It was in reaction to an article written by Tris Dixon in the widely-read London trade weekly Boxing News about Donaire’s travails as a kid. Donaire related how he survived life as a boy in General Santos City and his father’s insensitivity growing up. Donaire’s mother came in her husband’s defense and went on the offensive to lash out at the fighter’s wife Rachel Marcial and her parents.

Donaire had previously talked about his early life in a Ring Magazine interview and essentially, told the same tale to Dixon but his mother didn’t react until word got around that he would earn $350,000 for the fight against Montiel.

Perhaps, Donaire shouldn’t have gone into details about how his father treated him in the gym, how he was scolded in public and how he played second fiddle to brother Glenn who blew two chances to win a world title. But it’s difficult not to leave out those intimate stories that reflect the hurt in the heart.

To be sure, Donaire didn’t mention anything about his father taking up with another woman in Cebu and abandoning his family in the US. He didn’t put down his father who fell out of luck as a boxing trainer when one by one, his wards lost in world title bouts – Marvin Sonsona, Ciso Morales (knocked out in a single round by Montiel) and Ana Julaton.

In fact, in other interviews, Donaire often cited his father for opening his eyes to the art and science of the sport, making him a thinking fighter, not just someone who enters the ring with a knockout mentality.

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Donaire, however, talked about an incident where his father was caught taking money from the fighter’s kitty to fill his own pockets instead of paying for a legitimate training expense.

Donaire’s mother took issue with the Marcials whom she accused of controlling the fighter’s finances and future. She spoke about “rules” that excluded participation of her family in affairs that involved Donaire.

Rachel was understandably furious over her mother-in-law’s accusations. More than anyone else, Rachel has been a guiding light in Donaire’s flourishing career. Rachel is virtually Donaire’s manager and she’s a tough negotiator. Proof of her ability was Donaire earning a bigger purse as a challenger than Montiel who was the defending champion. Montiel pocketed only $250,000. Rachel’s work in the backroom allows Donaire to concentrate on boxing, staying in shape and keeping focus in the gym and in the ring.

After Donaire’s mother went on the attack, Rachel said there would be no comment from her side of the family. Donaire himself kept mum, preferring to avoid distractions while training for Montiel. But Rachel promised to tell all in a press conference when she arrives with Donaire in Manila about a week from today. She said she would show evidence pointing to financial shenanigans by Donaire’s father.

But is it really necessary to wash dirty linen in public? At this stage of Donaire’s career, nobody’s thinking about his father or mother. Fans all over the world are raving about Donaire’s sensational second round knockout over Montiel, a feat that should improve his pound-for-pound rating which is currently No. 5. Montiel had never been knocked out before and his two previous losses were via close decisions. He is one of only a handful of Mexican fighters to win world titles in three divisions – the others were Julio Cesar Chavez, Erik Morales, Marco Antonio Barrera and Juan Manuel Marquez.

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Donaire shouldn’t stoop down to the level of those who thrive in intrigue and gossip. If Donaire has issues with his family, he should resolve them quietly, without fanfare like a son reaching out to his parents.

Donaire’s future is wide open. He could be the next boxing superstar. Top Rank chairman Bob Arum himself said Donaire has the potential to become a collector of multiple championships, all the way to superfeatherweight (130 pound-limit). At the moment, he is legitimately a two-division titlist, having won the IBF flyweight crown. Donaire used to hold the WBA interim superflyweight diadem but that doesn’t count in the reckoning because of the “interim” status.

Donaire could choose to expose his parents and the whole world will listen. His parents don’t stand a chance in a public forum. Donaire is a world champion with a multitude of adoring fans. His parents are struggling and down on their luck. Reconciliation, rather than retribution, is what’s important now for Donaire. Forget the past, the hurt and the harsh words. To forgive is a virtue.

I’ve known Donaire for years – ever since he came to Manila in 2002 fighting in undercards to ply his trade. There is no question he has a big heart. I’ve known his wife Rachel and her family even longer as we are relatives. I know Donaire and the Marcials are good people, generous and kind. I’m sure they’ll find it in their hearts to forgive and forget, to share God’s blessings and to reach out to those who are in need of understanding.