Farewell to a mom-in-law

(Editor’s note: Below is a special column by Mr. Joaquin Henson on his mother-in-law who passed away recently).

Writing about your mother-in-law in a sports section of a major daily newspaper will ordinarily be difficult to justify. But this is an exception because my mother-in-law Carmencita Fargas-Genato, who passed away last Thursday night, was no ordinary lady.

For starters, sports was in her blood. Her late father Gil Fargas of Zamboanga was the country’s first tennis superstar who was described by Enrique Romualdez and Virgilio Pantaleon in The Sports Page as “a high-powered backhander and probably one of the tallest (5-11) and fightingest net artists that ever swung a racket on local courts.” Fargas beat US Davis Cupper Bryan Washburn, bagged three Far Eastern Olympic championships and won four Philippine singles titles during his reign in 1913-21.

Her mother Maria Esteban of Cavite was a competitive swimmer. My mother-in-law was the eldest of three daughters, the others being Gilda Puey and Edith Castillejo.

When my mother-in-law was a St. Scholastica’s student, she often went to the Rizal Coliseum to cheer for the La Salle basketball team in the NCAA. She enjoyed sports and in her prime, joined and won tournaments in badminton and bowling.

STAR president Miguel Belmonte recalled that once upon a time, many years ago, his brother and Philstar.com president Kevin teamed up with my mother-in-law in a mixed doubles badminton tournament that bridged generations at Club Filipino.

Sports was a passion for her husband, Dr. Jose Xerez-Burgos Genato Jr., too. Dr. Genato, now 83, played on the unbeaten UST team that captured the UAAP basketball crown in 1946-47 with Olympians Ramoncito Campos and Pocholo Martinez, Col. Julian Malonso and Tito Eduque. Dr. Genato also played commercial basketball for Torres Optical.

As sports was in their genes, the Genatos’ four children were born athletes. My wife Menchu was a national pelota titleholder, club swimmer, the first women’s squash champion at the Palms Country Club and recipient of a Philippine Football Federation award for organizing and playing on the first Philippine women’s team. Her brother Pepito was a star striker for the national football team and in April 1976, scored the decisive goal in the Philippines’ 1-0 win over China in the prelude to the New York Cosmos (featuring Pele) versus Japan match before over 20,000 fans at the Aloha Stadium in Honolulu. Sister Vicky and younger brother Robert also played football.

While my father-in-law is the anchor of the family, my mother-in-law was the ship. She kept the flag flying and the ship sailing. Her love, support and guidance were indispensable.

During her two-year battle with Stage 4 uterine cancer, my mother-in-law got our family together and made us closer than ever. We cherished our time with her, praying, keeping strong, trusting in God and leaving her fate in His eternal wisdom.

My mother-in-law was my biggest supporter when I courted Menchu. Once, when another suitor began to make headway, it was my mother-in-law who gave me her unconditional vote and showed Menchu the way “to see the light.” I will always be grateful to my in-laws for bringing into this world the love of my life.

My mother-in-law was overwhelmed by the affection, love and friendship she was showered in the course of her illness. Her faith in the Lord was reinforced by her friends from the clergy, including Fr. Fernando Suarez, Fr. Julius of Asian Hospital, Fr. Grato of St. Jerome and Fr. Blas. She looked forward to the daily visits of lay ministers who gave her Holy Communion, namely, Freddie Burgos, Bert Soriano, Tim Laws, Carlos Pedrosa, Bert Villa Abrille, Benny Araw, Conrad Javier, Edwin Afzelius and Peter Picornell. Her doctors were as competent as they were compassionate – Dr. Sid Pasion, Dr. Genara Limson, Dr. Alan Paul Olavere, Dr. Josefina Ramos, Dr. Richard Toh, Dr. Leonor Fernandez, Dr. Ernesto Chua and Dr. Vincent Macalintal, among others. Her classmates, including Tita Goni, Buena Romualdez, Dela Gamboa and Lita Recto, often visited as did her former neighbors from Spencer Street, Cubao.

My mother-in-law drew even more strength from her relatives, her two sisters and their children, brother-in-law Tony Genato and Nenita Matute, brother-in-law Eddie Genato and wife Lydia, sister- in-law Lily Genato and daughter Margie, the Xerez-Burgos clan (Bibay, Freddie and Tina, Bilit, Tess and Tommy), my mother Marina and friends Letty Bengzon, Ludy Carriedo and Maritess Pineda.

A visit my mother-in-law never forgot was when her favorite TV personality Kris Aquino and PBA star James Yap surprised her at home one afternoon and exchanged stories for more than two hours.

For over two years, my mother-in-law went through four surgical procedures, chemotherapy treatment, rehabilitation to improve her breathing and extended stays at Medical City, St. Luke’s and Asian Hospital. When the end came, she was fully prepared to meet the Lord.

It was difficult for us, her family, to let her go at first until we were spiritually consoled by Fr. Jong Sabandal of Northfield, Quezon City. Fr. Jong, who is a doctor of medicine, was referred to us by a good friend Tonet Itchon.

Three weeks ago, my mother-in-law – her physical condition severely weakened – was rushed to the Asian Hospital.

My brother-in-law Robert flew in from the US where he lives and stayed with her at ICU for five days. Last Thursday night, our family and close friends were with her when the Lord called. We had just recited the Angelus when she passed away, a smile on her face as she made her way to heaven.

Carmencita Fargas-Genato would’ve turned 76 on April 7. She was married 56 years with Dr. Genato. Her pride was her family of four children, seven grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. She was a special person who now has a special place with God in Paradise.

(Mrs. Genato’s wake is at Our Lady of Fatima Chapel, Tierra Nueva Village, beside Alabang Hills, on Alabang-Zapote Road. Interment will follow the 10 a.m. Holy Mass at the Lower Chapel of the St. James the Great Parish in Ayala Alabang Village. In lieu of flowers, her family would appreciate donations to the Tierra Nueva Chapel Construction Committee.)