Remembering Max

Death anniversaries are bittersweet times. Bitter, because the absence of a beloved is once more felt. But, it is also sweet because one feels nostalgic about the love and devotion of my 28-year-old husband Max who followed his father’s admonition to continue courting me – and he did, until he died of a massive heart attack in Japan, the year before our golden anniversary. Never was there a dull moment with my journalist husband Max V. Soliven. Everyday as he finished doing his column, he loved to hear my reaction to his sharp analysis of national controversies or his astute observation of the unfolding history of various countries. He would say, “Your comments reveal to me how the regular readers react to my article.”

He always took me along wherever he went either here in the Philippines or abroad. Except on his last trip to Japan in 2006. An outpouring of grief lasting a whole month from various people all over the Philippines and the whole world deluged my family and the Philippine STAR. On the occasion of his birthday last Sept. 4, I would like to share with you the loving sentiments people have expressed to me about my husband.

Get hooked reading Max’s column

MSgt. TOM BRITT of Angeles City – “I’m a full blooded American and a retired USAF. I got hooked to reading Max’s column when I was able to get the STAR everyday way back in 2002, when my Special Operations squadron was deployed to Mactan for the fight against terror. The columns of Max were always to the point with no favoritism. I would always tell people to read his column and many of my Colonels were hooked readers just as I was. Always wished he runs for president or something to straighten out many of the problems here, but I’m sure his columns carried just as much clout. He obviously had no problem calling someone out if he was wrong! And I’m sure all the big powers here were avid readers whether they claimed to be or not! I heard someone say something about re-publishing his columns. Great idea! Do that and I will continue my subscription.”

Our eternal gratitude by heeding your clarion call to greatness

EDWIN ANTEPUESTO of Cebu City – “Thank you, Max, for sharing yourself to us until your very last breath. Indeed, you are a priceless gift to the Filipino nation, a gem of a son, truly a modern day Jose Rizal who moved us with your incisive pen. Thank you for letting us partake of your inspiring stories of hard work and determination overcoming tremendous adversities, of courage triumphing over fear and injustice, of faith prevailing over despair. In life, you were unerring in reminding us to have strong faith in ourselves and trust that, beyond the pervading atmosphere of gloom, we can rise from pettiness and despondency to be a glorious nation once again. In the afterglow of your death, may we – as well as those yet unborn – learn to appreciate better your legacy of heroism and express our eternal gratitude by heeding your clarion call to greatness.

“You have spoiled us with your columns. In amazing fashion, you just kept them coming while we yearn for more. You were the best at what you did. It’s been kind of hard lately to open the pages of my favorite STAR knowing I won’t find your BY THE WAY piece anymore. But I continue to relish the STAR and even your inimitable columns, especially those I missed to read before, courtesy of the Archives Section, which however, covers only from 2000 up to 2006. I wish that one day a compilation of your columns… nay, masterpieces will be made. Every piece of it is such a wonderful learning, inspiring and uplifting experience that it would be sheer injustice if it weren’t made available for posterity.”

He never mocks the ill situation of our country

AIMEE MACARAMBON of Lanao, Mindanao – “The lively morning news on the radio in Metro Manila was something we did not have in Mindanao when I was in College (MSU-IIT). However, we had Sir Max in the Philippine STAR every morning. Reading his column was a daily morning brain exercise then. I must admit though that there were times, a lot in fact, when I would find myself disagreeing with his views. But, how beautiful and persuasive he could be, that most often I end up agreeing. He had a profound way of making people believe in him without taking away from them their thinking mind. He never underestimated his readers, however crucial his points of view were.

“He never mocks the ill situation of our country. While he is quite conservative, he defied conventions in the name of Freedom of the Press as well as the Freedom of Expression and Speech. I wish I had the chance to listen to him in person. He must have had a deep and delightful voice. Indeed, he was a mentor I never met and talked to.”

Faithful friends and fans

From MARIO OROSA of Fairfield, Ohio: “Since the Philippine STAR became available on the internet some years ago, I have been a faithful reader of your husband’s column. I always looked forward to noontime here (US Eastern Time) when it would be midnight there and the next day’s edition of the STAR became available. You probably don’t realize how large a following Max had, not only in the Philippines but worldwide. I wish I had the privilege of meeting him during my visits in Manila since some of my family members were his friends. My late brother Augusto and cousins Naring often talked about him when we went to Club Filipino in Greenhills.”

DAVID PARAISO who worked with US Federal agencies, like Department of Defense and the IRS, regularly shares his expertise with Asian Institute of Management, in his earnest desire to help the country. He shared this poem with me:

God looked around His Garden

and found an empty place.

He then looked down upon His

earth and saw your loving face.

He put His arms around you

and lifted you to rest.

His Garden must be beautiful,

He always takes the best.

He knew that you were suffering,

He knew you were in pain.

And knew that you would

never get well on earth again.

He saw your path was difficult,

He closed your tired eyes,

He whispered to you “Peace be Thine”

and gave you wings to fly.

ASAWIN THONGTHAM, who works as project manager of Siemens Company Bangkok, is the son of Thai Royal Project Director M.L. Charuphant ‘Noi’ Thongtham, who designed the O.B. Montessori farm in Alfonso, Cavite and regularly monitors it since 1998. His Filipina mother, Normita works with Bangkok Post. Asawin writes – “Sir Max was among the great journalists and historians of our time. He inspired many people and he was a very good friend to our family. His death is such a sad loss to us.” Asawin’s father, Noi, recounts, “The memory of his kindness and unselfishness will cling to my memory always.”

From my daughter MARINELLA BAMBA from Los Angeles: “We are a family truly blessed with numerous friends. With this grief we feel the love of the whole world. I keep receiving so many calls overseas and here. It is truly overwhelming. Aside from my own set of friends, even Sara’s friends have contacted me. Suzy and Fletcher are one of the earliest to call… We have been trained by our matriarch (Mama dear) to look at death in a non-traditional way. Sure we will miss the physical presence of papa but his new life is forever. Among all my children, I know in my heart that it is ‘Beaver’ who is most affected – he and Papa had a mutual affection for each other.

It is amazing how all three of us sisters can really write...straight from our hearts… See, papa has shared with us his talent and what better way we can use this considering we three live quite a distance from each other.” (Rachelle is a registered nurse who lives in New Jersey. While Marinella lives in California and Sara is the chief operating officer of O.B. Montessori Center.)

St. Elmo’s Fire: Man in motion

ANNE MARIE BAKKER, daughter of family friend Jack and Offie Bakker, is the marketing, sales and communication manager of Tyco Europe. She emailed from Paris – “I write you both because for me, you represent a unique union of minds, hearts and truth – very rare and very potent. I know Uncle Max still hears us today. He reminds me of the song Man in Motion by John Parr. Uncle Max, you have left a legacy as a fighter of the truth that will be hard to live up to. This worthy goal for me and many others lives on forever. I will miss your presence on earth, but I am certain that your force will continue to help lead our nation through those you encountered around the world. I am honored to have met you in my lifetime. You to me are like ‘St. Elmo’s Fire’ – 1,000 volts per centimeter, a massive current of electrons guiding us with your blue light through dark and stormy periods. I learned a lot even from pure observation, your writing and teachings.”

The eulogy I addressed at my husband’s necrological mass

Madame President, we are very honored to receive the Lakandula award for my husband. He was very happy receiving the Ordre National du Mérite in 1991 from the President of France Jacques Chirac, the Encomienda de la Orden Isabela la Catolica from His Highness King Carlos I of Spain in 2000, and just before his death, the Legion d’Honneur, the highest decoration from France; but this is a greater honor – being recognized by his own country, on home soil. (The Congressional Medal of Achievement was also posthumously awarded to Max by Speaker Jose de Venecia.)

So dearest Max, I receive these honors for you. I feel happy that God in His loving mercy has led you home quickly – painless in a way. Dear, our friends are here. We feel very sad because physically you are not here. We will miss you. Up there, you are together with Ninoy, Ramon Magsaysay, Louie Beltran and Art Borjal – with all our dear friends who have died for our country. People from here and there came. People we don’t even know but know you. You are their dearest friend.

FINALLY, MAX’S WISH HAS BEEN FULFILLED: “If I Would Have My Name Endure I’ll Write It on the Hearts of Men.”

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