Cinderella or Bitterela - Who will you be this Valentine’s Day?

MANILA, Philippines – There are two types of girls during Valentine’s Day – Cinderella and Bitterela.

Cinderella is the kind who will get her perfect ending before clock strikes at midnight while Bitterela is the kind who will wallow over her beer the whole night.

So who would you be? For people who have just been recently single, the struggle to remind themselves that Valentine’s Day will be better than the last is painful. Constantly reminding themselves that this week shouldn't be a week about hiding from love, but celebrating it has been a routine that gets more tedious as the 14th approaches.

As the heart’s day ushers in, we cannot help but imagine how you will be on that day. For starters, you have to accept the possibility that you will not get a box of chocolates nor a bouquet of roses. Need I remind you that you and your boyfriend just broke up? Accept the harsh reality that he will NEVER give you those mushy Valentine’s gifts so you would not end up disappointed, and worst devastated.

And just because you won’t get roses, it doesn’t mean you have to hate your friends who will get theirs. Be happy for others and admire the fact that someone is there to shower them with love. Do not put yourself in a hole of resentment. Remember, you once had yours. Put your place on their shoes. How would you feel about friends who just can’t control their jealousy?

Find comfort through your family and your single friends. Sometimes, after the pain of heartbreak, we forget that the first person's love we should seek is our own. You are not defined by your relationship status. When you and your partner were together, it almost felt like you knew everything about love. You felt strong, at the same time vulnerable, stripped of the power you thought you’ll always have over your heart, mind and body. This is the time to regain the heart, mind and body you thought you have lost when he went away. Know that you are loved even before he arrived in your life.

That’s how you should be. That’s how you should act like. But life isn’t perfect and life isn’t just like the movies where there’s a well-practiced ending. People always talk about being noble, brave and admirable on Valentine’s Day, but the truth is, you cannot force someone who just isn’t ready to do so.

The thing is, love is neither an overpriced card nor chocolates that will give you diabetes. Love does not mean a bouquet of roses to make up for your lack of warmth for the other 364 days of the year. Love is not a helluva an expensive meal for two.  Love is not a competition about who and who didn’t get a gift for Valentine’s Day. Love means staying true to how you really feel. Like sometimes, the best way to celebrate the 14th is just to not care about what the people around you would think of you. Go out, get drunk, get lost and find yourself the next day, or the next few weeks, just as whenever you are ready.

So which one will you be for Valentine’s Day? Would you stick to what other people expect you to be or would you stay true to emotions? Whichever it is that you choose, keep in mind that  hype of it all will pass, and that the truth is, February 14th is just another day in the many more to come.