Forget the Michael Jackson tribute (and Madonna’s rather touching speech and shocking reveal that the two once dated or Janet’s awesome performance of their duet Scream) or Lady Gaga’s bizarre number. It was all about Kanye West and Taylor Swift at this year’s MTV VMAs. Swift, who won Best Female Video, was in the middle of thanking her fans when Kanye burst onto the stage, swiped her mic and interrupted the teen with the obnoxious pronouncement that Beyoncé deserved to win the award, claiming that Single Ladies was “one of the best videos of all time.” Who knew he was such a fan? Kanye’s ambush led to some serious crowd booing, while Swift, standing blankly on stage (and clearly in shock), was quickly herded off the dais to make way for a Tracy Morgan clip.
“When did you know you made a mistake?” Jay Leno asked West, when he apologized on Leno’s debut talk show. “As soon as I gave the mic back to her and she didn’t keep going,” West confessed, drawing a sympathetic laugh from the crowd.
Leno, entering douchebag territory himself, asked him what his dead mother would have to say about his recent behavior, prompting the rapper to pause for more than a few uncomfortable seconds to compose himself.
This was the second time the rapper has apologized. The rapper took to his blog immediately after the show to say, “I was rude. Period.” And even called Swift directly when she went on The View to make amends over the phone.
Despite his boorish behavior, we can’t help but feel for Kanye who’s already been cyber spanked by fellow celebs on Twitter. Donald Trump’s already called for a boycott of his albums.
Choire Sicha defended Kanye in The Daily Beast, noting, “One millionaire was mildly mean to another millionaire. Make no mistake: little Taylor Swift is at the head of very wealthy and successful business empire. And the head of another business empire was mildly impolite and out of order at a music awards show! Which is to say he created some excitement not previously sanctioned by an MTV producer.”
But, much as the Internet and people on my Facebook would have you believe, Kanye wasn’t the only walking mistake on the show. Numerous celebs looked like they needed an ambush of their own — an ambush makeover. Let’s get to the good, the bad and the gaga.
Leighton Meester
Celine: I love her! She never has to try in my eyes!
Bea: Blair is back. And girl really knows how to work that red carpet.
Amanda Bynes
C: Classic Ho-llywood.
B: Is she trying to be Mariah 2.0? ‘Cause nobody — and I mean nobody — can imitate my girl Mariah.
Alexa Chung
C: Although she is relatively a breath of fresh air from the homogenized Hollyweird pack, the dress is just not cool enough to carry itself into an acceptable level.
B: Laced and confused.
Beyoncé
C: Finally, VMA appropriate!
B: She looks hot but there’s something a little too arico mambo about this dress.
Lauren Conrad
C: Well, she didn’t just leave the show, she left her style as well.
B: Just because you’ve retired from The Hills doesn’t mean you have to dress the part of a senior citizen.
Whitney Port
C: At first glance she has that telenovela dazzle, then you realize it’s Whitney Port. Looks like The City has confused our LA girl with an overreaching cocktail dress meant more for a Julia Restoin Roitfeld.
B: Here’s a challenge. Take the leftovers off some designer’s cutting room floor, roll it around till it resembles some facsimile of a dress and then foist it on the nearest gullible blond.
Pink and Shakira
C: Great performers, lousy dress. Imagine the bitchfest over this unfortunate frock that evening.
B: Someone’s stylist is gonna get fired. Here’s the deal: Pink wore it better. Shakira looked like she was trying out for the role of Latex Barbie — and failed miserably.
Katy Perry
C: Just because she was born to major church preachers, the songbird’s ongoing rebellion makes even streetwalker wear intriguing.
B: If Barbarella and Gene Simmons had a crystal meth-addicted kid, she would pretty much look like this.
Taylor Swift
C: I love how she’s going to be such a biatch!
B: As far as curtains go, this is a pretty one.
Cassie
C: Contempo cautionary tale.
B: I hate people who do things halfway. And this whole half-shaved head doesn’t work for me. Looks like there was a power outage while she was playing around with an electric razor.
Stephanie Pratt
C: Could not believe it was double agent Stephanie. She looks like a long-lost ho twin of the Olsens.
B: The Hills’ resident crazy person is going for the Morning After Barbie look. I have to admit, she’s got it down pat.
Nicky Hilton
C: You can never be Paris! You can never out-ho her!
B: Is she wearing Pink’s leftovers? Girl, you need to stop borrowing clothes from a certain skanky sibling and quit shopping at Baby Phat.
J.Lo
C: No words, all sleeves. Definitely Scientologist.
B: Liberace meets Louis Vuitton.
Lady Gaga
C: I’m waiting for her to get Rachel Zoe’d.
B: Recipe for disaster: Take one part crazy, one part Phantom of the Opera, mix with a few feathers and finish with a neck brace. The finished product? Lunatic asylum chic. I’m loving it.
Amber Rose
Celine: Shapeshifter, anyone?
Bea: Just when you thought Kanye couldn’t have it worse, he brings a date who looks like she got swallowed by a python on the way to the VMAs.
Rose Byrne
C: Looks like she did some damage at Glenn Close’s closet.
B: Classy doesn’t translate to the MTV market. This is kind of granny next to the S&M outfits on the red carpet.
Lo Bosworth
C: How low can you go? This looks like a throw pillow threw up on her.
B: My grandmother had a carpet that looked just like this. The Hills star should’ve given me a call, I would’ve loaned her the carpet for free.