You think you’ll be young forever when you’re a child. The upperclassmen look so old. The high school girls are practically middle-aged. You can’t imagine ever leaving elementary, let alone going to college (if you even understand the concept of college at that point).
While I always knew that, at some point in my life, I would be a grown-up and I would have to get a job, the 10-year-old I used to be never really thought that day would ever come.
It did. Five months ago.
It’s scary to venture out of high school into the great unknown that is college. It is a million times scarier to leave academia for the infinitely greater unknown that is adulthood. We know school. Even if it’s a new school, we have some frame of reference as to what it will be like, because we’ve been to school.
For the first time, I was at a complete loss as to what my life would be like. Work was something new.
They told me it would make me more independent. Frankly, I don’t think you can put my name and “independent” together in the same sentence without the word “isn’t” between them. Being independent means not having to rely on anybody else, and as I can’t cook, can’t clean, can’t drive, and can’t do a lot of things, that is obviously not me.
Getting a job hasn’t enabled me to live on my own and it probably won’t for a while yet. (Though my parents let me do almost anything I want now, and that’s pretty awesome.) I don’t mind that I’m not as independent as I expected I would be by now, because I love what I do. Most days, I’m amazed to be doing what I’m doing, but on those rare occasions that I’m so stressed I could stab everyone repeatedly with a pen, I remind myself that I lucked out. I write for a living. I’m doing something I love and someone else is paying me to do it. You can’t ask for anything better than that.
Earning your own money feels good. After spending my parents’ money for 90 percent of my life and feeling quite beholden to them for all the nice things they’ve bought me over the years (thanks, Mom and Dad!), it feels empowering to be able to spend my own dough for the things I want. But that’s only secondary to the fact that my job makes my life so rich. I’ve interviewed celebrities for work who have said that they love acting because it’s the farthest thing from a desk job — every day, you are someone else. Every day, you try something new. It’s always exciting.
To a certain extent, being a writer is sort of like that. Sure, some days, I’ll be camped out at my desk in the office, but on another day, I’ll be in Binondo with a camera slung over my shoulder, learning about UNICEF’s programs for street children. I’ll be doing a salon review. (I love those!) I’ll be snorkeling in Cebu and then writing about the experience. I’ll be meeting incredible people. I’ll be doing amazing things.
And I will never be bored.
* * *
You can e-mail me at vivat.regina@yahoo.com.