It’s raining memes

MANILA, Philippines - Tumblr.com is a website that feeds on humanity’s dreams. It mines the inner recesses of our brains for our deepest desires and fears, and turns them into an addictive photo and video feed that sucks users in for days.

The latest product of the Tumblr machine comes straight from the depths of our nightmares. Meet actresseswithoutteeth.net, a Tumblr blog that features dumbfounding images of actresses… without teeth.

“We love actresses. We just love actresses without teeth more,” the site’s owners declare. And they’ve put in countless hours of Photoshop work in pursuit of their art. If you’ve ever wanted to know how your favorite female celebs look without their pearly whites, this is the place to go. And actresseswithoutteeth.net has photos of everyone from Angelina Jolie to Lena Dunham.

Is this the work of Satan? How high does someone have to be to think up a concept like this? What does this say about humanity? The site leaves more questions than answers. But one thing is sure: actresseswithoutteeth.net will leave you in stitches… and quite possibly, strangely, aroused. So, here’s a sample of what you can get on the site. Warning: NSFL (“Not Safe For Life.”) Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

Hadokening, vadering

Elsewhere on the interwebs, more profundity. We’ve recently seen the births of two new memes — Hadokening and Vadering. To geeks, these names are self-explanatory, but for those of you who have had intercourse, here’s what they mean. “Hadokening” is the reenacement of the “hadoken” power move from Dragon Ball Z, while “Vadering” means reenacting Star Wars’ Darth Vader’s famous choke maneuver. “Why?” you may ask. Well, kids these days feel an insatiable need to Instagram stuff, and in their quest for stuff to post, they come up with the weirdest things.

After planking, Hadokening ,and Vadering, What kind of “-ing” will the web spurt out next week? We hear there’s a hip new social media meme coming out of Kenya, called “starving.” It’s when teens post pictures of their exposed ribs. Oh, these crazy kids. — Pepe Diokno

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