Yes, be careful if you make a woman cry

In the last two decades, I have unconsciously gravitated towards the spiritual, getting drawn to friends who introduced me to books, places and philosophies which I openly received. This immersion I believe, made me see things from the "spirit" and not from the mind where logic is formed. In short, I guess I was what my siblings, in-laws and close friends described as "out of my mind." Being an artist also contributed to my seeing things from "left field" perspectives.

It is from this orientation that I would like to share with all men and women a Valentine’s Day message given to me – appropriate for National Women’s Month. Strangely enough, it was from someone who didn’t know who he was giving it to.

A friend who was concerned about my long-time "stage of single-blessedness" had arranged for us to casually meet at a Valentine’s Day Ball at the Polo Club. That’s another story for the books. So as not to digress, let me go back to this gentleman’s borrowed inspiration from the Hebrew Talmud which says:

Be careful if you make a woman cry

Because God counts her tears.

The woman came from a man’s rib,

not from his feet to be trampled on.

Not from his head to be her superior,

but from his side to be his equal.

Under his arm to be protected

and next to his heart to be loved.


While I read this, each line made my pulse beat as though I was getting a blood transfusion. My heart was thinking – gee, how true this is, but why do scores of women around the world still cry tears from broken hearts and broken spirits, from aborted dreams and why are women suppressed from expressing themselves without being judged.

On a different spectrum, women have overcome barriers and liberated themselves from the shackles. They are women who are driven by the strength of their spiritual convictions to be what they dream to become. Some accelerate their passage with the support of their men – whether they be husbands, paramours, fathers, brothers, sons or friends. No matter what level of society these women come from, they survive.

I remember my days in Mondragon when I got to really know these "superwomen." They were abused by their men and in a last ditch effort to save family and self, they enlisted as door-to-door sellers. Their bruised hearts healed in the process as they discovered their worth. A lot of their relationships were also revived as their men became partners in the business sense, too. My hair would stand each time the top sellers would be called on stage to be awarded – these women had sold over a million in a month’s time and yet none of them had the privilege of a full education. Not even a master’s degree holder could perform as much, considering the odds. Their joy of accomplishment and of the chance to creatively express themselves freely was shown in their confident gait and the glow of their made-over faces. I salute these women over and over again. Look around you because they are there. And when one of them visits your office or home to sell you a dream, support them. You will find that your generosity will be repaid with good karma.

This year’s National Women’s Month underscores women’s rights under the Convention on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW). This is an international treaty which was ratified in 1981. The Philippines is among the scores of countries that has signed up in CEDAW. Women’s groups and even consumer companies have consciously acknowledged and supported the woman in her quest for self-discovery and actualization. Lady’s Choice this month celebrates her creativity and resourcefulness, encouraging her to freely express herself as she unravels the creative in her. At the core of every woman is her inherent nature to create and express.

Let everyone know this, embrace it and enjoy it.

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