Kindergarten dad's top hits for May

Since the elections are just a few days away, I told my wife that I was planning to write about who I’d be voting for on May 10. She made a face and asked, “Oh, yeah? Who asked you?” Indeed, who am I to presume to tell others whom to vote for? I also probably don’t even have the power to influence anyone except my nine-year-old son (trying to tell the women in my family what to do is as dangerous as campaigning in Mindanao hot spots). But such are the intoxicating effects of our country’s national pastime that even a small-time columnist like me actually gets tempted to believe that I need to enlighten and influence others on whom to choose as our next President.

On the other hand, it could just be another harmless way to massage my own ego. Some studies in the US suggest that even the endorsement of heavyweight personalities has little impact on politics anyway and can even harm rather than help a candidate. Recent surveys in the Philippines also show mixed results. For example, although a high percentage of respondents reported that they would support the candidate of some popular figures, there were almost just as many who also said that they would not. In some cases, the net effect was even negative. 

Still, trying to tell others which politician’s name to put in their ballots can be as tricky as attempting to tell someone who to choose as their spouse. It’s certainly not the same as recommending what product to buy or which American Idol to save till next week. In the first place, the people whom you did not endorse are likely to bear a grudge against you forever (well at least until the next election). Secondly, politicians in this semi-feudal country literally have life-or-death powers over most of us. Thirdly, like marriage in the Philippines, there is also no divorcing our leaders during the four or six-year union. And so even if we can’t stand to look at them anymore, our politicians are nevertheless likely to force us to still live up to our conjugal obligations till the next elections do us part. (One could, of course, try a People Power type divorce and run away with someone else, but look at what our most recent elopement got us into.) Making the wrong political endorsements can therefore invite a lot of blame and the more influential you are perceived to be, the greater the potential criticism.

I recall how my father used to warn priests against making categorical political endorsements. He cited the example of a young man going to a bishop for help in selecting a wife. My father said that the bishop should help the man by just telling him what the characteristics of a good wife should be, such as honesty, diligence, humility, spirituality, dignity, etc. It should be up to the man to then go out and look for a good wife on his own ... “Katrina, Gretchen, Marian, Ambrosia — Ah, Ambrosia is my choice!” My father said that this is how it should be as well in political questions. The bishops should limit themselves to general principles and leave it to the people to make up their own minds. The bishops cannot say, “Roberto, you should marry Ambrosia.” That will potentially cause one million problems and the bishop’s primary role as shepherd of all the people could be severely damaged. Katrina, Gretchen, and Marian might think that the bishop sees them as sluts. When the couple starts quarrelling, Roberto will also go to the bishop and complain, “Monsignor, the person you selected is no good after all!”

Since, however, I am neither a priest nor do I consider myself influential, I guess it is okay for me to make some sort of political endorsement. For party list, I strongly recommend ABA (number 23 in the ballot). They are one of the few original and genuine party list groups. But in keeping with my father’s sage advice, I’ve decided to be a bit nuanced in my other choices by making my recommendations in the form of song titles just like one of those “Best of ...” or “Top hits of ...” music albums. If any of you readers out there are really interested to know who I’m referring to, you can e-mail me to see if you guessed right. Before you think that my song choices are too obvious, however, note that Tie a Yellow Ribbon could very well also refer to Erap (“If you still want me ...”). Jejomar and Bayani can each make for a dashing Mr. Suave as well. Hopefully, even if we end up with different candidates, we might still discover that we have similar tastes in music!

President — Tie a Yellow Ribbon

Vice President — Mr. Suave

Mayor (Quezon City) - Flordeluna

Vice Mayor (Quezon City) - Joy to the World

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Please e-mail your reactions to kindergartendad@yahoo.com.

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