Dear Nanay,
I’ve always read your column and never thought that I would be asking for your advice. I am an OFW and married to a foreigner who is working for a company that’s closing. This was announced one and a half years ago and they also mentioned that no one is to be retained or transferred to other plants. Each employee was met one-on-one and made aware of the severance packages that we are getting as mandated by local law.
Last Dec. 22, I was given a plane ticket to go to an affiliate plant and was interviewed for a position. A proposal was given to me, we negotiated for a win-win contract and I was to start work on July 1, 2009. Nothing was mentioned regarding the severance payment that I am supposed to receive from the current company that employs me and as far as I am concerned, it is a separate entity and they have to give me the local law requirements. Last week I was informed that the management is not going to pay severance as I am transferring to another plant.
I am in a complicated position as I was working on the premise that I would get my severance pay. Am I entitled to it or not? Also, the severance package is quite substantial and could be of great comfort if I go home to the Philippines with my family. Should I take the risk, take the package and try my luck at finding another job in this current unstable market, or take the next risk, forgo my package and work away from my family (as we cannot afford to bring my wife and child with me)?
Mr. Confused
Dear Mr. Confused,
With regard to whether or not you are entitled to severance pay, I am not in a position to answer that. I do not know where you are and even if I did, I am not an expert on labor laws. My advice would be for you to consult a lawyer and get proper legal advice.
However, it sounds to me like you basically have to make a choice between taking the new job, forgoing the severance pay and accepting that you will be away from your family or taking the severance pay, forgoing the new job and coming home to the Philippines to try your luck here.
If you accept the severance pay, you could definitely come home and start your own business or try to find a new job. But as you said, these are not the best of times to start a new venture or to try and find a job. I do not know how difficult it will be for you, so you are taking some risk. No matter how you look at it, it will be a bit of a gamble.
I think it will be financially safer if you just take the new job. You would have to make a few sacrifices, like being away from your family, but at least may trabaho ka (you have a job). Mahirap mawalan ng trabaho ngayon. (It is hard to lose a job these days.)
If you want to get your severance pay and the new job, I do not know if you can “have your cake and eat it, too.” You might be asking for too much. However, I do not think it will hurt to try and negotiate. They might not be willing to give you the full severance package, but they might be willing to give you one-half or one-third. Sayang din iyon. (You shouldn’t waste that chance.) And I am sure the company wants you. Otherwise they would not have offered the other job to you. So you might not be able to get everything, but maybe you can get something.
What you just have to remember is to be reasonable and have your priorities straight. Is your priority the job or the severance package? You have to be careful because in your efforts to try and get everything, you might end up with nothing. It is a balancing act that you will have to work on.
Sincerely,
Nanay
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How Do You Ensure A Child Does Well In School?
Dear Nanay,
My wife is about to give birth to our first son and I want to make sure that he will be smart and do well in school. You see, when I was a student I did not do so well. Maybe I did not study enough, but I was always just getting passing grades and envious of my classmates who were smarter and getting better grades. I always wished that I was a better student and that was one of the biggest regrets of my life.
Now that I am going to have a son, I understand the feelings of being the parent. I only want him to be the best he can be. And as responsible parents, we want to do what is best for him to prepare him for his future school days.
What can I do?
Infanticipating Father
Dear Infanticipating Father,
There is nothing wrong with wanting the best for your children. I think that is what all parents want. And there is nothing wrong with helping your children be the best that they can be. However, you have to be very careful. There is a fine line between encouraging your children to excel and pushing them too hard. And only you can determine the balance that you will need to find with regards to your children.
Having said that, I think one of the best ways to prepare your young son for the coming years — without overly pressuring him — is to simply read to him. Spend as much time as you can reading to your son and exposing him to books.
Put in the time and effort needed. Especially when the child is very young, there will be many times when he will seem completely disinterested. Parang wala siyang pakialam sa binabasa mo. (It will seem as if he doesn’t care about what you read to him.) There will also be many times when you will fall asleep after reading the same book dozens of times. But do not give up. Just remember that every minute you spend reading with your son is a minute very well invested in his future education. Pagtiyagaan mo. (Persevere at it.)
But as I mentioned earlier, you have to make sure that reading and learning remain fun for your son. You should not overly pressure him. If you treat “reading time” as your fun time together, your son will want to read even more because this is his quality time spent with you. Use it positively, not just as a chance to learn but as your chance to bond and spend some time together.
If you do all this, he will develop a love of reading as he grows up and this might be one of the best gifts you can possibly give your son.
Sincerely,
Nanay
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