Five hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes/525,000 moments so dear/525,600 minutes/ How do you measure, measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee, in inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife. —Seasons of Love, Rent the Musical
Christmas is a season of love. A time to reflect and perhaps ask the question, “How will you measure your life?” A book with the same title by Clayton M. Christensen can provide the lead. The material is derived from the graduation speech delivered by the author at Harvard Business School in 2010, which the Harvard Business Review turned into an article, and later into a book, with co-author James Allworth and Karen Dillon.
It is a tome resulting from the encouragement of his students, a number of whom had expressed that his class had truly helped them as they finished their business study — not just in their careers, but more largely in their lives.
The concise, easy-to-read and optimistic book is a business view of life, not in balance-sheet terms but more from the aspects of personal and professional principles, moral values, and integrity. It is prearranged into three parts. The first part talks about happiness in your career and the true basis of motivation and reward, while the second part discusses how to find happiness in your relationships, and how to use time aligned with your priorities. Part three dwells on living with integrity and the downside of trivial versus critical thinking. If you want to help yourself, determine how to measure your own life, and effect changes based on what you see and believe using the life tools available to you, this paperback provides some cues.
You can, in a purposeful fashion, enunciate the kind of person you want to become by speaking the ethos that you would want to follow in your life, as you act on the things that can help you become the kind of person you want to be.
The purpose of your life is about becoming the kind of person that God wants you to become, and through your study of the scriptures you can articulate the kind of person that God would be happy about. You might not believe that there’s a God that will assess what you did at the end of your earthly existence, but certainly everybody who knows you will judge what you did. The fact that you are no longer here may just be a fleeting thought unless you made a positive or negative impact on them. Or you may have influenced them in profound ways, and they fondly remember you long after you’re gone.
It’s easier to be true to your principles 100 percent of the time than to be true to them 98 percent of the time. The boundary — your personal moral line — is powerful if you don’t cross it. Now, if you have justified doing it once, there’s nothing to stop you from doing it again and again. Decide what you stand for. And then be firm about that stand all the time.
The source of your deepest happiness comes from the investments you make in intimate relationships with your spouse, children, and close friends. But if you measure your life by how much money you make or where you go in a hierarchy, you invest more and more to maximize those things and less and less of your time and energy on family matters. You have it in your head that family is important, but most of the time you invest in things that are counter to what your heart desires.
What will make you happy on the job is the substantial opportunity for responsibility, growth and achievement, and the probability that you can achieve those things is clear. Sure, you would always prefer more money to less money, but there is no evidence that more money makes you happier.
You believe you’ve figured out what you need to do to be successful, and you hunker down and execute that strategy. And you don’t look for opportunities that pop up at the periphery. The things that really make your career are almost always the opportunities that inadvertently arise. You need to have a better balance between a deliberate strategy and staying open. Because in the end, you finish up being successful in a career that you never imagined you would be in at the beginning.
The most important piece of planning for retirement you need to think about, outside of having enough money to survive, is how you are going to orient your life towards helping other people become better people. You may have struggled much in your adult life without a clear purpose. Yet, when you think about the legacy you want to leave behind on top of your purpose in life, then you feel more grounded and emotional about who you are, why you do what you do, and what you have become.
“Commonness” took a random survey among Facebook friends on how they measure their life, and got these interesting quotes:
Carol Gancia of Ripplemakers, Inc. in California: I measure my life by the people I loved, the lessons I learned from them, the people who loved me, the lessons they learned from me, the lives I’ve touched, the people who have touched my life. Those are my milestones.
Eugene Lopez Moskaira, Lawson PSSC: Knowing honestly how many people I was able to help in one way or another. This will include people who hated me for something that they will find useful later in life.
Joey Reloj, Hunter College, NYC: My life is full of experiences, good and bad. I will measure it by the experiences I have had and will have. Time is fleeting; why waste another moment? Carpe diem! Love more, life more. Live for the now for we can never know what is waiting around that next corner. Why measure life by just material things? Measure it by the amount of lives you have changed by just being you. We all can make a difference, “measure” by small “measure.”
Norelyn T. Babiera, Fiera de Manila, Inc.: My life can be measured by the accomplishments of its mission — positively affecting people to deliver them to their purposeful destiny. In short, making them happy in every stage of their lives.
Dindo M. Balares, entertainment editor: By the joy — smiles, laughter and hugs from my family, relatives and friends; and disgust — frowns and disdain — on my enemy’s face whenever they see me.
Lawrence Elmer Ibarle II, UST: My family is my core, my motivation. When they are made happy by my success, then that means I have made my mark.
JM Hilario, Physician’s Cooperative, Chicago: Hard! Difficult! It is very subjective and I will let others say what they think but, if I may, it is how happy I am and that is the true measure of how I have excelled in my life, my career and my family, which are, by the way, my priorities.
Aries Belza Espinosa, PANA: Like the song Seasons of Love. I will measure my life in terms of love — by how many times I’ve made my friends smile and laugh, and by how many times the world has made me smile and laugh in return.
Gene delos Reyes, Silver Spring, Maryland: Maybe not just by monetary stuff but also by how other people view life after you have touched and inspired them. I go back to my working days in Citibank Phils. I remembered a talk I had with one of my staff when I told him to consider going back to school and finish college, because I believed in his capability and talent, so I warned him that he could not be promoted if he didn’t have a degree. After I left Citi, he told me that he decided to go back to school! I was so happy because I was able to inspire him with my simple advice.
Leo Katigbak, ABS-CBN executive: I try not to measure but I look at it as a spectrum of experiences with few regrets and lots of learnings.
Eric Francis Ladioray Galang, Tambayan 101.9: I treat every day as it comes, different from what it was yesterday. I adapt to whatever the day requires of me. This way, I find it easier to love my family, inspire my audience, complement people around me, and just generally give out positive vibes. I believe that’s how life should be, anyway.
Charo Logarta Lagamon, Metrobank: I measure my life not by the wealth I made, the status I’ve reached, or the material things I have. I measure my life by the people whose lives I have touched, helped and nurtured. It’s far better to be remembered by people for the smile you put on their faces, the goodwill you generated or kindness, rather than by bad deeds or the ill will or hurt you caused.
Leo Santos, College of Saint Benilde: As an educator, by how many minds we’ve taught, how many hearts we’ve touched and how many lives we’ve transformed.
Arlyn Q. Bautista, mom, Singapore: I’ve known people whose entire lives have revolved around making and keeping money. Not that there is anything wrong with making money; it is what has made our capitalist system the greatest economic engine in the history of the world. It is how they have made their money that is important. Proverbs 11:1 puts it clearly: “The Lord abhors dishonest scales, but accurate weights are his delight.” Living life to the fullest of living and loving; of sharing our precious time not only with loved ones but others; of courageously accepting the adversities that have befallen us; and working through these experiences, small or great to the best of our abilities.
Gregoria A. Hernandez, grandmother from Laguna: I think the best measure of my life is the way my children are living their own lives now, their values and attitudes, their love and concern for their family and others as well as their achievements.
Jade Rance Acidre, property developer: Through the people I associate with. To those I treasure most, I never forget to give back even in the simplest ways. And when I reflect, I feel contented with just being the provider of happiness because once upon a time, I was at the receiving end. To measure your life is to measure your contribution to society and to your family, and how you truly matter once you retire.
Andro Marioramon Balein Abustan, copywriter: Wisdom and courage. Your wisdom will lead you to your humble mission given by God, and then courage, which is having the prudence to do what has to be done. You carry your “cross” and start to live life to fulfill a noble cause.
Julie Baldado-Odra, FB friend: By having known and experienced the depths and range of human emotions, by being in touch with life itself.
JP Jacinto, Trec Pacific: It may sound like a soundtrack from a play but it is what is. I never realized it till I reached my 30s. I have been living life not knowing that I have been leaving a mark on the lives of the people I interact with.
Ida Bata, PR practitioner: Growing old and not fearing it because I’m confident I can still come through a few hundred more tough breaks coming my way.
Boyet Javelona Sison, ANC anchor: I actually don’t measure. I just try to do what is good and beneficial for the many. A simple and sincere “hello,” a smile, a warm hug, can make a difference for a lot of people. And I try to give that every day without the expectation of anything in return. And why measure in the first place?
The way to measure one’s life by how you have helped other people to become better and happier is the common theme that emerges from the Facebook responses. And that is the biggest thought that should come to mind if you are unhappy. Come to think of it, the satisfaction you get from investing in other people stays with you throughout your waking days.
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E-mail bongosorio@yahoo.com or bong_osorio@abs-cbn.com for comments, questions or suggestions. Thank you for communicating.
How Will You Measure Your Life? is available at National Book Store.