Roco’s widow eyes Senate seat in 2007

It’s been a year since the death of former Sen. Raul Roco and his widow Sonia vows to preserve his legacy by herself running for a Senate seat in next year’s midterm elections.

"If there is an election next year, I will run on the same platform of hope. I will fight for and continue to stand for honest governance, education for all and equal opportunities for everyone, the same ideals which Raul had fought for when he was still alive," Mrs. Roco said yesterday, her husband’s first death anniversary.

Roco, also a former education secretary, died on Aug. 5, 2005 at the age of 63 after a long bout with prostrate cancer. He ran against President Arroyo in the May 2004 elections but lost. He temporarily left the campaign a month before the elections because of failing health.

"The absence of his presence is everywhere," the former Sonia Malasarte said, quoting a line from the poem "Time Does Not Bring Relief" by Edna St. Vincent Millay.

She is quite amazed at how everything and everyone constantly remind her of her late husband.

"When people whose lives he had touched see me, they come up to me and say they remember Raul. I also remember Raul when I see them. That is why a line from St. Millay’s poem always comes to my mind because Raul may be physically absent but he is present everywhere," the 62-year-old Roco told The STAR.

But making the decision to run for public office was not easy, she admitted.

Her friends had advised her not to run and first weigh the pros and cons. She was torn between following her husband’s footsteps or living a private life.

"I was thinking about the ifs and buts. Like what if I just focus on developing our family farm in Antipolo or our beach house in Panglao island (in Bohol) but I can’t just throw everything that my husband had worked for, his dreams and visions for this country," she says.

"I can’t put aside what I’ve learned from Raul or set aside the exposure I got from being with him through all these years. I was the closest to all of his dreams and plans to improve the lives of Filipinos. Right now, I am discerning public office as a path I consider getting into.,"

Being a politician’s wife for most of her adult life, she knows the dirty world of politics.

"My friends would tell me, Do you like to be swallowed alive inside a lion’s den?’ I know that but not trying is cowardice and I don’t want to be a coward if I will just consider how dirty the world of politics is. As I’ve said, I can’t throw everything I’ve learned from Raul and I know he would like me to continue. Gusto ko bigyan ng importansya ang pinaghirapan niya (I want to give significance to what he worked so hard for)."

She has also weighed the pros and cons and is ready to take the plunge.

"There are the pluses and the minuses. On the plus side, Raul’s name recall is strong. They remember what he has done, in terms of his legacy. It doesn’t mean that I’ll be as good as he was because I am not a lawyer but in terms of giving service to the people, I can devote my time and energy to public service, anyway, my children are all grown up. My plus factor is that I think I come in a really high moral order," Mrs. Roco says.

She says she’s no longer fazed by the lies that might be peddled against her by political foes.

"But at least now, siguro hindi naman na nila sasabihin na binubugbug ako ni Raul, right?(I think they won’t say anymore that Raul is beating me up, right? ) At hindi naman talaga (And he really didn’t)," she said with a warm smile.

What she’s concerned about is her youngest daughter’s reservation about the toll that politics might take on her health.

"Synara would tell me, ‘Mommy, baka ikaw naman ang magkasakit (it’s you who might fall ill this time),’" Mrs. Roco said. "But I’ve thought about it and the consequences. All of these details are part of being at my crossroads. I know I’m not standing in a vacuum but I’m standing in a world full of realities that might be cruel or inspiring but I’m prepared."

She points to the experience of accompanying her husband in the grueling 1992, 1995, 1998 and 2004 election campaigns, saying she’s had "seen the poorest of the poor." "You know, Raul has so much confidence in the talent and capacity of Filipinos and I, too, share that belief. The Filipinos can rise above challenges given the right set of leaders who will help them. It’s really hard to put things together in a country where the leaders betray the people. But there’s still hope."

She says she would run under the banner of her husband’s party, Aksyon Demokratiko. She is also considering coalescing with Senate President Manny Villar’s Nacionalista Party or Sen. Franklin Drilon’s faction of the Liberal Party.

Moving on

These days, Mrs. Roco is a picture of quiet serenity. "The whole year just went so fast. It is a whole world for me now. My friends would tell me, welcome to the byuda (widows’) club."

She has been busy donating her husband’s law books to San Beda College, where Roco took up law. She also donated some of her husband’s personal documents on the 1971 constitutional convention, to which he was a delegate, to the Ateneo de Naga in Camarines Sur, where he hailed from.

"I also promised to give them little by little the novels of Raul," Mrs. Roco shared.

A memorabilia section had been erected at the Ateneo de Naga and named "the Raul Roco library."

The Naga City government had also declared Oct. 26 as "Raul Roco Day."

Mrs. Roco says she’s been also busy preparing for the launching of a foundation named in her husband’s honor, the Raul Roco Professional Chair in Philosophy, Literature and Humanities, wherein money will be put aside for professors of philosophy, literature and humanities.

"This is one way to remember Roco and what he fought and stood for. This is keeping alive his legacy," Mrs. Roco says.

These days, it’s easier to talk about the pain of losing her husband.

"Just like what others went through when they lose a loved one, you go through stages, I got depressed and then angry, then I bargained with God and then I learned to accept."

Whenever she meets friends or politicians past 70 and 80 years old, she can’t help but get childishly angry at her husband for dying at age 63.

"You know, there are times I’m angry at Raul. I tell him that he left me so early while others who are in their twilight years are still alive. I just realized that he died so young," she relates.

But of course, she has learned to accept God’s will.

"It’s in Eccelesiastes. There’s a time for everything. A time to love and time to cry, a time to leave and a time to stay. There’s a plan and purpose for everything. It is something you can’t avoid. But no matter what, you get still hit by it, it’s like, boy, oh boy, death is real and it happened so fast. These are things you reflect on."

The most painful process she went through was choosing what her husband would wear for the burial.

"Will he wear a barong Tagalog or what? There were so many dresses to choose from. That for me was a very painful process. And then when he was dressed up, all I could say was ‘gwapo naman ni senator (the senator looked so handsome).’ And then you get consoled by those who have been bad to him who’s suddenly good to him now. Those who have been cruel and unkind to him who are suddenly nice but you learn to forgive them. I’m sure Raul is in heaven."

One of the highlights of her healing journey was when she joined Fr. Soy Hernanco’s 40-day caravan spiritual pilgrimage to 35 cities in honor of St. Exequiel Moreno, a Spanish priest who stayed and preached in the Philippines at a time when the revolution was beginning to simmer.

"We went to this ambitious healing caravan and the whole time I was with the praying population," Mrs. Roco said.

One thing that struck her was how people would go to prayer rallies and convention without the promise of money.

"I thought how come during elections, money is such a big factor. Why is money such a big factor for such a sacred duty, which is choosing your leader. When you go to a prayer convention, that is sacred but you don’t get bribed. When you vote, you also have a sacred duty not to sell your votes. You have a gift of choice. It should be the same thing," Mrs. Roco said.

Despite the flaws in the political system, Mrs. Roco believes there’s still hope for reform and hopes that the seeds her husband sowed would someday bear fruit.