Effort, Pain and Sacrifice

Look at the variety of “pain killers” we have on the market. Today we emphasize “the easy way” in everything: instant meals with microwave, learning calculus or English without toil,  losing weight the quick and easy way,  disposable items such as plastic bottles, plates, aluminum cans –even husbands and wives are sometimes disposable,  to avoid the pain of living together.

But suffering is part of the human condition and part of being human. As the familiar saying goes, “no pain, no gain.” There are no important achievements without effort, pain, and sacrifice.  

This applies to arts, sports, science, and technology. This applies in a special way to love and commitment, the cost of discipleship,  the following of Christ.  

The cost of discipleship involves a dying of the self,  which is inescapable if one wants to become a new creature in Christ.

There are two kinds of suffering:  the necessary suffering and the unnecessary suffering.   The unnecessary suffering is the suffering I bring to others by my selfishness. An example is when I wreck another’s marriage  because of my adulterous relationship,  or I create a traffic mess with my chaotic parking,  or by ignoring the traffic signs and blocking the intersection  and passageway.  

It can be the suffering I bring upon the people of my country  by my practice of graft and corruption. It can be the suffering brought upon myself through my negligence, and an unhealthy sense of guilt and stupidity. Examples include abusing myself  with prohibited drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes. There is the unnecessary suffering of the epidemic of AIDS and other sexual diseases brought about by unrestrained sexual promiscuity  encouraged and supported by some societies and governments.

Much of the sufferings in the world are unnecessary and man-made – the unwanted pregnancies, the terrorist bombings, the violence;  the injustice, the exploitation of the poor, the defenseless and the powerless; the irresponsible waste of natural resources that results in calamities.  

These are all from the sinful misuse of human freedom and choices. And often we blame God for the consequent sufferings  of this misuse of human freedom.

On the other hand, there is the necessary suffering, which refers to the suffering involved in growing up,  in facing my limitations, in admitting my mistakes,  in struggling with a problem,  in sharing someone else’s suffering,  in shouldering a normal responsibility,  in accepting reality, in giving up a harmful habit, etc.

The first degree of wisdom consists in understanding the difference  between these two kinds of suffering.   The second degree of wisdom consists in avoiding the first  and embracing the second.

In the past, useless pain and suffering  had been unhealthily glorified in some spirituality.   Some heresies have condemned pleasure:  “If it is enjoyable, it must be sinful.” Certain schools of spirituality in the past centuries  such as Jansenism and Puritanism were often too pessimistic and negative,  based on the cultivation of suffering – suffering for its own sake.  

Consciously or unconsciously, this has influenced much of our own spiritual outlook.   Jesus Christ is usually depicted by artists as a stern, serious-looking person.   Too seldom do we find the picture of a laughing Christ.  

Even the pictures of the Saints show all serious-looking people,  either looking shy or looking heavenward.  

Our present generation, marked by the smiling figure of Pope John XXIII  and by Vatican II, has turned its back on all that. We are more and more influenced especially in education,  by theories advocating self-affirmation, self-fulfillment, self-expansion,  and spontaneity.

But sometimes modern psychology can go a bit too far. For fear of inhibition and repressed feelings, we come to think that any kind of suffering is bad.  

Faced with his impending passion, Jesus has a different reaction:  He trusts his Father.

He believes that his Father is powerful enough to produce life out of death,  joy out of suffering. He was proven right by his resurrection.

In today’s Gospel, Jesus is speaking of the necessary suffering  involved in his own destiny and in the life of anybody who wants to live humanly – that is to accept to “lose his life” – face the necessary suffering in order to find it,  that is to know fulfillment and happiness.

Our world promises pleasure (not joy), and rejects all forms of suffering. On the other hand, Jesus promises joy with suffering –  and sometimes joy through suffering.  

Not that suffering is to be cultivated. On the contrary, we will be judged on our fight  against the suffering of our brothers and sisters. But the cost of fighting against suffering of others  such as hunger, insecurity, injustice, loneliness  will itself bring us its own suffering and cross. Yet, it will be a fruitful, positive and fulfilling kind of suffering –  the kind compatible with great peace and joy.

When it comes to the cross in our life, we have the choice to accept it or reject it.  

Either we can pick up our cross and carry it,  or we can turn away from it and refuse to carry it. Whether you are born with a handicap, or are suffering from a tragedy in life,  you have the same choice. You have the same choice that Jesus had in the Garden of Gethsemane. Either you can drink of the cup of suffering that has been poured out for you  or you can refuse to drink it.

Of course, this is not easy. Even Jesus, the Son of God, recoiled at the thought of drinking the cup  of suffering that had been poured out for him, saying,  “Father, if you are willing, take this cup away from me.” But then he quickly added,  “Still, not my will but Yours be done.”

If we do not listen to Jesus and if we refuse to accept the cross,  we will still experience suffering,  the unnecessary kind, and besides be unhappy. If we listen to him, we will experience some suffering, the necessary kind,  but we will know happiness. Following Jesus makes all the difference in the world.

In today’s Gospel, Jesus promises that  if we pick up our cross and follow in his footsteps, he will lead us to life. And the life Jesus promises is not only life eternal in the next world  but also life, right now, in this world.

If we pick up the cross and follow in the footsteps of Jesus,  our cross can become a blessing and a stepping stone to greater things. Rather than serve as an agent of death for us,  our cross can serve as an agent of life,  just as the cross of Jesus served as an agent of life for all the world.

Let’s close with an inspiring testimony to the truth of Jesus’ promise  that he will give life to those who pick up their cross and follow him.   This prayer, written in the form of a poem,  was found in the pocket of a dead soldier:

“I asked for health, that I might do greater things. I was given infirmities that I might do better things…

I asked for riches, that I might be happy; I was given poverty, that I might be wise…

I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men; I was given weakness, that I might feel the need of God…

I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life; I was given life, that I might enjoy all things…

I got nothing I asked for; But everything I hoped for.

Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered.

I am among all men most richly blessed.”