Drive Another Day

Anyone who’s worth his popcorn knows that any movie in the James Bond franchise has a predictable but wholly pleasing formula: James will always be suave and will always have a vodka martini at least once.

There will be one Bad Guy, a plot to destroy the world (or a sizeable area of it) for profit or world domination, a needlessly expensive and complicated device like a big laser, perhaps one right-hand man, hundreds of henchmen, plenty of gadgets, and several girls... one of which is destined to be the movie’s good Bond girl. Oh, and his car. Whether it’s a specially engineered vehicle from the MI6 garage or something he just finds himself in (as with the Citroen 2CV in "For Your Eyes Only"), Bond cars and the chases they get involved in have always been special.

And at long last, purist Bond fans can enjoy his latest adventure with the knowledge that, yes, he is driving a proper British car. It’s not a Bentley, which is the car that James Bond creator Ian Fleming originally put him in in his novels, but at least his Aston Martin was made in Newport Pagnell and not Munich.

But the Americans own Aston Martin now, which explains why we are also treated to a veritable parade of Ford-owned cars and trucks in the movie. James has his V12 Vanquish (actually propelled by a V8 for the shoot). Henchman Zao (played by Rick Yune) has his Jaguar XKR. Halle Berry has a Thunderbird. Several Land Rover Range Rovers, Volvos, and other Ford Motor Company cars also appear. But unless I’m mistaken, this is the first Bond movie in which the villain has a car of equal prowess and sex appeal.

In the past, James has been able to destroy his enemies with the help of a car of clearly superior engineering, courtesy of the adorable Q (portrayed for years by Desmond Llwellyn). The Aston Martin DB5 in "Goldfinger" featured smokescreens, machine guns, and ejector seats; this was the Bond movie that would set the standard for future Bond cars.

His Aston Martin Vantage Volante in "The Living Daylights" featured skis, lasers, snow spikes for the tires, and rockets. His Lotus Esprit S1 in "The Spy Who Loved Me" turned into a submarine. His BMW 750i in "Tomorrow Never Dies" featured sledgehammer-proof glass, a wire cutter, remote control, an electrifying security system, and more rockets. In "Die Another Day" – stop reading this if you plan to watch it and want to savor the suspense – his Vanquish (called the "Vanish" by Q, now played by John Cleese) has a cloaking device, more of those rockets, machine guns, snow spikes, remote control, and an ejector seat.

Naturally, the plot has the appropriate moments that call for the use of all these aftermarket add-ons. But so does the XKR. Austin Powers presumably had plenty of fun moments in the backseat of his Shaguar, but "Zao" in the movie displays nothing but road rage. If you can suspend your disbelief at how anyone could drive around freezing Iceland with the top down, then you’re sure to admire the "Zaoguar’s" features, many of which could be useful in kidnap-happy Metro Manila. Like a Gatling gun right behind the driver’s right ear. A battering ram. Rockets behind the grille. Rockets in the doors. Mortars in the trunk. Oh, and a thermal scanner that defeats James’ seemingly Harry Potter-inspired cloaking device. This is a surprise after years of villains’ cars being no match for Bond.

Cool stuff. Which one wins the inevitable duel? If you haven’t seen it yet, consider that both cars are nearly equal in performance. Except that this is a James Bond movie and that he must, of course, win and bring home the chicks. Yet both cars are sponsored by Ford, and it wouldn’t do to have either of them thoroughly trashed for the mortification of Ford big shots and loyal fans. Only God knows how the BMW folks felt after their Z8 — actually an AC Ace with a body kit - got sawed in half in "The World Is Not Enough". The car chase sequence of "Die Another Day" has an acceptable compromise, but watch out for the ending’s playful poke at Audi-owned Lamborghini.