Louie (not his real name), an office worker in his late 20s, was experiencing an irritating problem. At 7:30 every morning, as soon as he was ready to drive to work, his ears started ringing, simultaneously with his eyes bulging. He suspected he was experiencing tremendous job stress.
He confided his problem to his boss, who suggested that he consult a psychologist. “There’s no doubt, Louie,” the psychologist said. “Quit your job, find a new line of work, and your problem will be solved.” Upon hearing that, Louie submitted his resignation to his employer, who wished him well.
Two days later, as soon as he had put on his favorite shirt and tie in preparation for a job interview, he experienced the same symptoms as before. His ears started ringing, and his eyeballs continued to bulge. After the interview, he went to see another doctor, who suggested having his lower teeth pulled out right away.
But that didn’t work either. His ears still rang and his eyes continued to pop out.
Doubly frustrated, Louie went to another appointment with a specialist in eyes and ears. After a series of tests done over three consecutive days, he heard the bad news: “You have only three months to live.”
Louie was shocked. After quitting a high-paying job, having his teeth pulled out, and now with only three months to live, he accepted his fate with grace. He decided to enjoy his final months on Earth. He sold his house and car and withdrew his life’s savings. He went on a spending spree.
He bought a new sports car and a boat and decided to have a business suit tailored for his funeral. The custom tailor, with 40 years in business, meticulously measured Louie’s body. “That will be 34 inches for the waist and a 16-inch neck.”
Louie immediately protested the tailor’s measurement. “No, that’s incorrect. Make my collar 15 inches.”
The tailor replied: “Whatever you say. But let me tell you one thing. If you keep wearing shirts with 15-inch collars, your ears will ring, and your eyeballs will pop out.”
This story is credited to Glenn Van Ekeren, who wrote the book The Speaker’s Sourcebook (1988). I remember this story, which came out 35 years ago, back when I aspired to copy Ekeren’s style as a public motivational speaker – an untenable job for an outsider trying to motivate employees.
After all, motivating people is job number one for line executives, who know them better than anyone, including the most prolific motivational speaker. Besides, motivating people is like taking a bath. You have to do it every day with your direct reports.
Command-and-control
Whenever I’m reminded of this story, I can’t help but relate it to the oft-repeated question from Uncle Scrooge of McDuck Enterprises, popularly known as the uncle of Donald and Della Duck: “How do I get my workers to be actively engaged in problem-solving and give me the best ideas without my company spending big money for the solution?”
Stingy managers agree with that question because they know that many employee suggestions are intricate and time-consuming for management to review. Uncle Scrooge’s question is a valid concern because problems could generate wrong solutions, if not create only costly and difficult situations for the organization.
So, why is this happening around us? This happens because of the command-and-control style of some managers who tell people: “Do it my way or go to the highway.” Line executives, supervisors and their workers have no choice but to follow irrational policies that were established years ago under a different context.
Even in the absence of circumstances necessitating those policies, workers and their managers blindly follow them because no one has challenged their rationale. Understand this through the words of management guru Peter Drucker (1909–2005), who said: “Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their jobs done.”
80/20 rule
Reflect on that statement. How accurate is it? Well, not exactly accurate. Focus on the word “Most.” If you’ve been in management for long, you may find it correlates with the Pareto Principle, which states that 80 percent of problems are caused by 20 percent of root causes, which include problem managers.
It’s easy to understand. Management controls almost everything. They have the authority. When the boss says “no,” all workers must adhere to it until that boss resigns, retires or moves on to the next life.
One day, I happened to closely monitor how my wife was cooking spaghetti when she realized we ran out of mushroom, bell pepper and tomato paste.
She asked me to run to a neighborhood Alfamart to buy the ingredients. “It’s OK,” I told her. “We can settle for whatever is available in the fridge. Instead, sauté one clove of garlic and one bulb of red onion, instead of the usual two to three measures for each one. Then, use tomato sauce, not the paste variant. That will serve the purpose.”
Still, my wife insisted on doing what she wanted. “I prefer to do it my way,” she smirked.
For me, that’s an excellent answer. It’s like in the office: how can you argue with the boss? If you follow, you’ll live in absolute peace and co-prosperity. Never mind the spaghetti.
Rey Elbo is a quality and productivity improvement enthusiast. For a free consultation, contact him on Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, or email elbonomics@gmail.com, or via https://reyelbo.com.