Reform or perish

A couple of weeks ago during the traditional New Year’s party for diplomats, Ate Glo called for a "revolution in the way we think and in the way we do politics and economics." She warned, as the headlines the next day declared in big bold letters, Reform or Perish.

The thought haunts me in a way that yesterday’s news normally doesn’t. I think she touched a raw nerve. She is thinking precisely what I have been thinking and worrying about. Now I know she knows that we are running out of time to institute reforms. She knows too the price for failure is to perish.

Well, it seems we should fall down on our knees and prepare to perish. The unfortunate reality is, we are not ready for a revolution in the way we think and the way we do our politics and our economics. The leftists just want their revolution, bloody or otherwise, to get political power. The politicians just want their perks and pork. Ordinary folks are worried about just getting through the day. And it seems, Ate Glo does not know where to begin… how to do anything about her bold diagnosis of our social illnesses.

Then again, maybe, the journey to the battlefield starts with a few small steps. Filing charges against the PEA directors and a few of those involved in that scandalous PIATCO contract revisions are the small steps that finally get us going. But why were the big fish not charged as well? Ate Glo should also prod her anti-graft body to do something about the anomalies at the GSIS with regard the multi-billion peso Napocor insurance premiums.

That GSIS scam that had been going on since forever was exposed by Jess Alcordo, Ate Glo’s initial choice as Secretary of Energy and later, to head Napocor. The charges were substantiated in an exhaustive exposé done by Sheila Samonte Pesayco of the Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism (PCIJ). How come it was Jess Alcordo who lost his job and nothing more was heard about the insurance premium mess?

Actually, if it is reform that Ate Glo wants to accomplish, the Napocor is a fertile ground to test her resolve. She has this golden opportunity to reform the organization from scratch because of the mandate in the Epira Law. But I am told that reform initiatives are losing out to entrenched interests there.

A PR functionary at Napocor wrote me to protest an earlier column where I pointed out that old gangs at Napocor are frustrating proper restructuring of the organization. The fellow, a Dennis Gana, wrote that they do not know of the existence of any gangs as I described. He wrote that I only rehashed old charges against the organization.

Well, maybe Mr. Gana is new to Napocor. I have known Napocor from the inside from the early 80s. If he is unaware of corrupt elements in the organization resisting reform, maybe he has adopted the defensive mode of cocooning, hearing and seeing no evil. I am surprised he wrote that "it is impossible for a group of old timers to be calling the shots." Is Mr. Gana for real?

Maybe he has not heard of the case of a manager assigned to protect the watershed who managed to get himself promoted to vice president for human resources. But he didn’t want to let go of the watershed job. How the two functions are related escapes me. But the watershed function is a cushy position. When they finally caught up with him and wouldn’t give him both areas, this guy tried to elevate the rank of watershed manager to VP level. How’s that for adopting the Napocor reorganization to fit the requirements of the powerful old hands?

As far as I know, the Napocor Board and its Chairman, the Secretary of Energy had traditionally been hostages of the entrenched gangs in Napocor. This is why it is so essential that Ate Glo uses the Epira to reform Napocor from scratch.

The Epira sets aside funds so everyone can be fired. But money is being wasted paying benefits since the old guys are being re-hired anyway. They must first pass the scrutiny of an independent panel of experts not connected with the old Napocor. I know that’s not easy to do. It’s so much easier for Ate Glo to deliver speeches warning Reform or Perish. She can say she warned us when the inevitable happens.

I have been invited to join Ate Glo for lunch today at Malacañang. I really don’t know what for. If she will just convince us that she’s sincere about her reform mission, the only way to do that is to do a Nike: Just do it. I am assuring her even now that I am with her in this endeavor. If driving through Sta Mesa traffic in rush hour is the price I must pay to give her moral support, I will do it. I hope she will tell us today how she will save us from, well… perishing. Nothing else is as important.

Marketing

Readers still ask if Dr. Ernie E is a real person. For the nth time, he is. Dr. Ernie E is an orthopedic surgeon based in Dallas, Texas and a graduate of the UP College of Medicine. He belongs to UP Prep Class 66, my high school class.

Then I am asked, how come he has time to send you all those jokes? Well, there must be some hours to fill in the dead of the night at ER. Most likely, Dr. Ernie E just has a great sense of humor and wants to share the jokes he enjoys.

Anyway, I think doctors have a great sense of humor. They need it to stay sane in their profession. Today, let us enjoy a joke being passed on by Dr. R. Jimenez from another colleague with a sense of humor.

Several women I know have asked me for an explanation of Marketing. Perhaps the following analogies will help clear it up:

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I’m fantastic in bed." That’s Direct Marketing.

You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says. "She’s fantastic in bed." That’s Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I’m fantastic in bed." That’s Telemarketing.

You’re at a party and see a handsome guy. You get up and straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I?" and reach up to straighten his tie brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I’m fantastic in bed." That’s Public Relations.

You’re at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you’re fantastic in bed." That’s Brand Recognition.

You’re at a party and see a handsome guy. You talk him into going home with your friend. That‘s a Sales Rep.

Your friend can’t satisfy him so he calls you. That’s Tech Support.

You’re on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you’re passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated toward the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I’m fantastic in bed!" That’s Spam.

(Boo Chanco’s e-mail address is [email protected])