My Fond Memories of Papa Inting

A few weeks ago we celebrated the special day for mothers. It was a day filled with tender feelings for the women that started us in life, in a most loving and nurturing way. Mother’s Day was such a heartwarming day.

Today, we pay tribute to fathers. Father’s Day is dedicated to these men whose value in our lives is similar to that of our mothers, albeit in their own distinct way. Fathers provide an air of security and assurance to the home.

Parents only want the best for their children. Even without prior training or preparation in parenthood, they just assume the function of being parents when they get to have kids. They never complain and, instead try their best – waking up at wee hours of the night to feed and change nappies of their tiny infants, spending sleepless nights to cuddle and try to soothe the pain of their sick little ones, having to deal with adolescent problems of their kids, and so on.

And yet children will never fully understand all the sacrifices of their parents for them – until the children become parents themselves.

At this point in my life I encourage those who still have both parents with them in their life to consider themselves lucky, fortunate and blessed. I encourage them to take the time before the end of each day to express their love and gratefulness for their parents’ presence in their life. A simple call or text message and a hug from their children can mean a lot to parents. The gesture is well deserved especially by ageing parents who had worked hard, sacrificed, and lovingly nurtured their children all the way without complaining – in fact, parents are only too happy to have done all that for their children.

There have been points in my life’s journey where I’d have to deal with medical and health issues. At those times, I’ve come to realize more and more that life indeed is a gift and is truly precious. I’ve had an eye occlusion, and a bilateral knee operation that developed an infection and thus required another surgery; I had to battle prostate cancer and undergo the tedious and long brachytherapy treatments that required me to travel frequently to Manila, to my great inconvenience and discomfort.

There was a time when I dreaded reporting to the office for my usual day-to-day duties at the University. I developed what must have been post-surgery depression, as I became inexplicably lonely and, like, lost my zest for life. Thank God, the loving support of my wife Nena sustained me and kept me going. She was always there to keep me company, encouraging and prodding me to pursue what she knew to be my passion, my various advocacies, and my responsibility to look after Papa Inting’s legacy, the University. At the time, I was able to finish my memoir “To Never Forget.” I took charge once again, and braved the tides; and life went on after that.

Alongside my faith in God, I’ve always been guided by the wisdom of my elders. In particular, having become a father myself I’ve come to value Papa Inting’s words many times more. I will always remember Papa with fondness in my heart.

Papa and Mama told my brother Eddie and me: “Remain prayerful and remember always that life is a gift from the Lord. Continue to love and be there for one another, especially for your sister Inday Sering. Be humble, humane and compassionate always.” Papa told my sister, “Inday Sering, if you want, you could be a very good teacher.” He told my brother, “Eddie, you will serve the community as public servant,” and me, “Dodong, you will take care of the little project we have started,” referring to the University.

I’ve seen the truth of what Papa said that “competence, education and knowledge can be learned within the four corners of a classroom – but never character and gratefulness."

And there was Lola Andè, our maternal grandmother, who echoed the same sentiments, thoughts, and ideas of our parents – for us to be always prayerful. She said that “it is always good to share whatever you can share and avoid being selfish.” Lola stressed the great importance of being humble, a virtue that has been ingrained in us siblings, to be humble at all times. 

I believe that true-blooded Gullases – like my sister Inday Sering, my brother Mayor Eddie and myself – have humility at the core of our consciousness. We keep at heart what Mama Pining told us: “Kitang tanan, lumalabay lang daw aso. May mga tawo nga mahikalimot nga ang tanan gikan sa abog, nga bisag unsaon og lupad-lupad uban sa hangin, sa katapusan mobalik ra gihapon sa yuta nga ilang gigikanan.” How true. We are all just passing by in this life, like smoke that soon fades away; and we shall not forget that no matter how high in the air we sometimes fly, we will go back down – because we are just dust that belongs in the ground.

Yet humble as I always remind myself to be, it still slights me when a fellow mortal questions or passes judgment on my choices in my life’s journey. I believe that such right is reserved only for my Lord, my God. I pray to my constant companion Señor Santo Niño, Mama Mary, and my brother, Servant of God, Teofilo Camomot that I may have more tolerance for my critics.

For now, I frown upon those who believe that having more possessions in this life entitles them to belittle, to look down, demean, criticize, and judge other people, especially those who place themselves above others simply because of their affinity to some “name,” and do not know how to look back and reflect on who they were and how they got to where they are now. This kind of people Papa and the rest of my dear elders would probably never approve of.