What's Cooking in the Red Monkey 2016?

Fire element year it is. And fire cooks everything. So what is cooking for you this coming Chinese year of Red Monkey?

If anybody is careless, fire burns everything too: career, health, lovelife and money! Let alone happiness and peace of mind. So, would you like to get burned or not? Here are fire-prevention or burn tips.

• First, start the New Year with ritual of fruit offerings, starting the eve of February 7 to herald Chinese New Year Day on February 8. Instead of the traditional eight kinds or similar round fruits and pineapple, it will be best for this year to use eight round watermelons (the type that's red inside) and a pineapple. Watermelon will avert any fire for the year being water element and greatly attract double prosperity for 2016 Chinese calendar year. Of course, this is something fake feng shui on TV do not know about, so keep it esoteric.

• On Chinese New Year Eve, wear marsala red combined with any black or blue accent color to balance the elements and have balanced prosperity, wealth and health. For politicians, be the first at the strike of 12 midnight to visit any Chinese Temple in your neighborhood and make a wish. This will come true.

• For the loveless, hang a peony flower painting or image in your bedroom during Chinese New Year (February 8 to 23) if serious on attracting a mate, together with a serious marriage proposal!

• For those having difficulties saving, investing or meeting medical bills due to bad health concerns, partake of any fortune dishes like clam soup, oysters or mussels to turnaround your finances for the better. For those who want to seriously become wealthy in life, try engaging a real not fake geomancer if you do not want to live a life of quiet desperation.

• For the unemployed or job seekers, take care of a mascot pet turtle. You will be surprised on how speedy it works.

• For the downtrodden, there is hope in the new year. If you can afford it, take care of a fighting fish (the cheapest feng shui remedy at less than 100 pesos).

• For the simple, loving, and caring ones, there is luck in wearing polka dot attire on new year's day. Make sure the dots are red and the background should not be blue or black nor white (bad feng shui). But for the gullible, suffer more in the hands of swindler feng shui merchants and fakers, you deserve it!

• For those who joined the wrong frenzy during western new year to celebrate Chinese New Year rituals, especially the wronged ones who wore blue, this is removal day for the duration of Chinese New Year; you can make up for it with the right observances and colors this time.

Remember too, lucky charms are not everything. No amount of buying lucky charms will work if you, yourself, your home and office are not attuned or fine-tuned to receive the blessings of good chi through good feng shui consultation and remedial applications to get you and your charms connected accordingly.

So what's cooking in 2016? You! Lest you opt not to get burned in your own lard, so to speak. Plan and act out your aspirations and goals rightly this year and do it right all the time with feng shui guidance for the better - not bitter.

Kong Hei Fat Choice!