The Name game

CEBU, Philippines -  One's name is the sweetest sound to his ears. It is the word - or set of words - that he is designated with, and by which he is identified and distinguished from others. Many people wish they had a more "sophisticated" name, like Sophia, Elizabeth or Helena or Beatrice. The most popular names vary among countries and cultures.

If your name is Habeas Corpuz and you just passed the bar exams, television networks would try to outdo each other in having you on their programs. You could be propelled to soaring popularity, become an instant celebrity on the social media as well. Or, conversely, you would probably cringe in shame or just be plain embarrassed having such curious name.

Your name could also hold you up at the National Bureau of Investigation if it's the same with that of a person who is on the run for estafa or murder! Just to clear that you are not one and the same person would take some time. The NBI clearance you needed immediately could take weeks or months to get.

I used to dislike my name. How would you feel about a name consisting only of a single letter - the tenth letter of the English alphabet? Okay, by its sound, mine might not be an odd one at all. But it would normally be spelled with two other letters: J-a-y. Even if spelled that way, it's a name that would better fit a male; and there was no doubt whatsoever about my gender.

On my first day in kindergarten, my father introduced me to the teacher with my middle initial "P" and then my complete last name. She must have had misheard him, because when she introduced me to the class she said I was "Chippy"! I thought that once you're in school you'd be given a different name! It was not until we were asked to wear name tags that everybody realized I was not their favorite junk food snack. Hilarious, but not for me.

Imagine feeling like you're not part of the class and you're yet a tiny grade-schooler. That feeling of being alone and lost that makes you wonder why you're in there in the first place. And yours is always the last name called - misplaced in the boys' list!

High school was no different. On roll calls in class, teachers would stop upon reading my name aloud; the whole class would turn in my direction. This would happen in all my classes, the whole day. The unwanted attention was discomforting.

I once had a crush whose last name was spelled with two letters. If we had ended up together (thank God we didn't), my full married name - with middle initial - would just have consisted of four letters! How would a name like that look when written down? It would have brought more confusion, I tell you.

Good enough that I ended up with six letters for my full name after marriage. And, still, getting a social security number took a long time. The computer system refused to accept my single-letter first name, and I had to wait for several weeks while they referred the matter to their Manila head office.

Consider the way many parents name their children. Some take great pains to pick the right names, while others decide rashly from the top of their heads. Take, for instance, the case of my former student whose name is BB Boy. Doesn't it look like one that you see on the tag attached to the baby crib at the hospital nursery? He told me his parents wanted him to be a girl. Again, funny - but certainly not to the boy.

With other parents, the possible names of the coming child are decided long before birth. Often, it's not the parents alone who are involved; the rest of the family or the entire clan is consulted, especially if it's a highly anticipated birth. Family elders refer to an "almanaki," a list of recommended names according to the actual birth date. Example: a possible name for the boy born on March 19 is Jose, or Josepha if a girl; which may be adapted to become Joseph or Josie for a more contemporary sound.

But many parents today choose names that are current bywords. We have young people with names like Paris, France, Africa and Rio; their parents are probably geographers. What's more, there are names taken after famous people. You're likely to have Nat King Cole or Bon Jovi in your neighborhood!

I had to add four other letters to my FB account name because, then again, a single-letter name was not acceptable. Friends thought it took a legal process to have my name changed, and that the change was permanent.

I'm no longer complaining about my name, I have learned to embrace it. Well, it doesn't matter to me now if I was named any other name - Lucrecia, Agapita, Perpetua, Purificacion, Surinam, Antarctica. The important thing is that somebody cared to give me one.

But, having gone through what I went through with my own, my daughters' names are not K and L. They are Kay and Elle. Well, I trusted my husband to decide on the grils' names. I didn't want to risk being tempted to name my kids in the same way I was.