Let go of the past

An acquaintance confided that until now she is haunted with her past. She was badly treated by her stepmother when she was in her tender age. When her stepmother was in a bad  mood, she would beat and placed her inside the cabinet. Whatever little mistake she committed, she  would received a tongue-lashing.

In her moment of aloneness, these experiences would haunt her and a surge of anger would engulf her inner being. Her stepmother is already old and she has now a family of her own. She wants to forget the past. But it keeps on haunting her.

I believe that letting go of the past is a tall order and is not an easy thing to do especially when we are badly hurt. But for the sake of  ourselves we have to learn how to let go; otherwise, we are always carrying the  burden of anger and bitterness  within us. It’s like carrying a monkey at our back all the time. Instead of focusing on unhappy thoughts, we should divert our attention on the good times, good moments that we enjoy in life.

The LivingWood of Wisdom website has this to say, “Letting go of the past not only helps you live your best life now, but also paves the way for future success. The past is gone, but every time you give thought to it, you bring it back into the present moment. Don’t let the past haunts you or be a cloud that hangs over your everyday life. Every time you recall your past unhappiness you bring it to life again and all those old feelings come back to haunt you. Unhappy or hurtful past events can bring heartaches, depression and destructive behavior in your life if you don’t let them go, especially when present events trigger a reaction in you that takes you back to that unhappy time. That is why letting go of the past is so important to your well-being. This is not an easy task and won’t happen overnight, but in time you can let the negative feelings of past events go and learn to live in the present moment free from old pain and suffering.”

To let go of the past, our source suggests the following ways:

•Become aware of your thinking and reactions in the first step to letting go of the past. So open yourself to recognize when your thinking turns to negative past events. When you find yourself dwelling in the past or thinking of unhappy past situations, your awareness of it will diffuse it and will allow you to bring back to the present moment.

•Positive affirmations are very useful in this process. They are wonderful tools to use to replace all those old negative past memories. Like this affirmation of letting go (whisper it to yourself):

“I let go of the past, live in the now and let the future unfold on its own. I no longer focus on the negative events in the past, but rejoice in the pleasures of the present moment. Past events no longer influence my life. I live fully in each moment. I live in the present, the past is gone and no longer plays a part of my life.”

•Imagine yourself ten years or twenty years from now. Realize that many of the things that bother you or haunt you don’t really matter in the grand scheme of life.

•Learn to forgive. Don’t be shackle with the past. Learn to move on and don’t let your past be your life companion. As Ajahn Chah once said, “ If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.”

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Email:kathey_oyson@yahoo.com