Father’s power

There’s no denying the influence fathers have on their children. Often, even their absence can make a difference, changing a child’s trajectory. In sport, we’ve seen how much dad‘s can change their children’s lives. Basketball alone provides many examples of this phenomenon. We’ve seen second generation players with the surname Jaworski, Banal, Ildefonso, Hubalde, Paras and others, proof of inborn hero worship. In some cases, the offspring follows his or her own path and takes up another sport, but still achieves the same level of excellence or higher. Here we’ve seen familiar last names like Lim and Patrimonio reaching success in other arenas.

In the early stages of life, a toddler feels he or she is physically part of his or her parents. This results in separation anxiety when the kid realizes that this isn’t the case. Parents are a child’s first heroes, before they grow old enough to notice their elders’ character flaws. This is hero worship at its purest. When Dad gets attention or does something well, it inspires the child to try it. Then, the work begins to keep them growing in the sport and away from frustration. This makes for potentially strong bonds with Father.

What is most important is for fathers to not impose their dreams, fulfilled or unfulfilled, on their offspring. The love for the game has to come from the child. What starts out as hero worship or wanting to do something with Dad must naturally evolve into a passionate desire to become better at it. Or else, it will take so much energy to fight the resistance to practice. Not all children will wake up early to do drills and scrimmages. You’d need twice as much effort just to get your kid out of bed.

In the end, forcing a sport upon your offspring may instead build resentment. Then it becomes a gamble to whether or not the kids will eventually hate the Dad and love the sport, or just long for the day when Father no will no longer have any power over them. That may take a long time to repair, even if the child becomes successful.

Granted, Father’s Day was an afterthought in response to the more popular and more commercialized Mother’s Day. It’s still worth it, as most breadwinners appreciate being appreciated. Most of us would not be who we are without the influence of Dad, for better or for worse.