Farewell to a dear mother

I never knew Lola Nene and it is my misfortune. Josefa Salud, 98, was laid to rest at the Loyola Memorial Park in Marikina last Sunday.

In the Requiem Mass at the Maria de la Strada Church on Katipunan Road, Fr. Tito Caluag spoke of Lola Nene’s "unobtrusive" ways. Ironically, Fr. Caluag said, she was a "rock-solid" influence on her family. Whenever she was around, you could feel her presence.

Even in death, Lola Nene’s charisma lives on. It is a legacy that she has left behind through her surviving children–Dr. Ben, Rudy, and Josephine. The eldest son Ramon or Tito has passed away. That she has touched the lives of thousands is an understatement. Fr. Caluag said as much in his eulogy. And as her children touch the lives of many more thousands, you know where the magic came from. As Fr. Caluag aptly noted, she was the vine and her children, their children, and their children’s children, the fruit. Lola Nena is survived by three of four children, 18 grandchildren, and 26 great grandchildren.

Dr. Ben is, of course, the familiar figure at courtside during Philippine Basketball Association (PBA) games. He is the league’s forever physician. When a player is hurt on the court, you see Dr. Ben rush to his side. Lately, Dr. Ben has been busy coordinating with the Department of Health in administering drug tests on PBA players.

Then there is Rudy, the former PBA Commissioner. When he served as secretary-general of the World Boxing Council (WBC), Rudy didn’t only make a name for himself but more importantly, for the Philippines. WBC president Jose Sulaiman has repeatedly acknowledged Salud’s contributions–as a diplomat, negotiator, and counsel–in laying the firm foundations of the governing body.

But more than Rudy’s astute decision-making, what makes him stand out from other sports leaders is his heart. Rudy genuinely cares for athletes. He reaches out to those who need his help. When fighter Gerry Penalosa was in his care, Rudy took him in as part of his family. That’s how Rudy is–he is generous, considerate, and kind.

Rudy is also a stickler for discipline. He cuts no corners. He tolerates no shenanigans. He is known never to compromise his principles. What he expects from athletes is what he gives of himself to others–100 percent, no less.

I never knew Lola Nene but I am told Rudy is what he is today largely because of his parents. Lola Nene’s husband Jose, who died 20 years ago, was a respected military doctor and Army general.

Lola Nene’s youngest daughter, Josephine or Ining, said her mother was fiercely religious and devoted to the Lord. As she grew weaker because of age, Lola Nene often asked God to take her home to heaven. But Ining would tell her the reason why the Lord hasn’t called for her is because He still has plans for her on earth.

The day she died, Lola Nene again asked the Lord to take her away. Ining said let the Lord do as He wills and she began praying the rosary with her mother. While reciting the rosary, Ining saw Lola Nene take a few deep breaths then quietly slip out of consciousness. For Lola Nene, it was the perfect way to go–with a rosary in her hands, praying to the Lord.

Mother’s Day was two Sundays ago and the Salud family celebrated it in a big way with Lola Nene at her home in Quezon City. But then again, Mother’s Day is everyday for the Salud children because even as Lola Nene has gone, she remains–in Fr. Caluag’s words–a "rock-solid" presence in their lives.

Five of Rudy’s seven children were with their families at the funeral Mass. Oldest son Chito, the National Home Mortgage Finance Corp. president, was with wife Gretchen and their children. Son Ato–preparing for a new assignment in Switzerland–couldn’t leave his office in Hong Kong because of work commitments as corporate communications director for Philip Morris International in Asia but will be here for Lola Nene’s prayers. Daughter Priscilla, a bank executive, is in Los Angeles. Son Arnold, a prominent ophthalmologist with the American Eye Center, and daughters Christine, Annabelle, and Margaret were with their families, too.

Also at the Mass were former Defense Secretary Renato de Villa, boxing promoters Rod Nazario (with wife Sandiganbayan Justice Minita), Moy Lainez, and Lito Mondejar, former PBA executive director Sonny Barrios, PBA technical director Perry Martinez, and writer Ronnie Nathanielsz.

There were beautiful flowers in the church sent by San Miguel Corp. Chairman Eduardo (Danding) and Mrs. Gretchen Cojuangco, San Miguel Corp. Vice Chairman and President Ramon Ang (who stayed until Saturday midnight at the wake), former Rep. Luis (Baby) Asistio, Sen. Ramon Revilla, Sen. Robert Jaworski, Mayor Jejomar Binay, Vice Mayor Nestor Mercado, National Broadcasting Network Chairman Mia Concio, Gen. Eduardo Ermita, Philippine Sports Commission chairman Eric Buhain and wife Rep. Aileen, Leo Prieto, Carlos Velez, Consul Eddie de Guzman, Jun Bernardino, Rey Marquez, Elmer Yanga, and many more.

Mothers are precious to all of us. They give us life, they take care of us, they bring us up, they see us through difficulty, they comfort us and they share their happiest moments with us.

My mother Marina is now 87 and I thank the Lord every day of my life for her. She is healthy, active, and vibrant. I lost my father Gregorio when he was 73 in 1986. He influenced my love of sports and I miss him terribly.

My mother is much like Lola Nene in that she is as unobtrusive but as influential. The world would be a much better place to live in with more mothers like Lola Nene and mine. Mothers give meaning to love–sweet love–and as the song goes, that’s exactly what the world needs now.