After reading "Chasing Daylight" by Eugene O’Kelly, I made it a point to follow his advice that we should all make time, make a special effort to tell the people who are significant in our lives how we feel about them.
Since we never know what could happen tomorrow, today is the best time to say thank you, to say I Love You, no fancy presentation or convoluted production number.
It could be as simple as a phone call, a letter, a visit, a walk down a favorite street or hanging out at your favorite park.
"Thank you," "I love you", "I appreciate you" or even more importantly, "I’m sorry" have a special meaning when we say it with purpose and not as a result of a medical bulletin, anniversary and other socially mandated ritual. Or when exposed for our sin or shortcoming.
Saying sorry after you’ve been caught, or hurt someone just doesn’t take the edge off.
Compare the sense of satisfaction you get or the special feeling when you receive a gift you really want, or you can really use. Compare that to receiving the "convenient – no brains needed" presents like ties, toasters, and pens.
What’s best about it all is that it actually confirms what we’ve always been told but never really believed: "it is better to give than to receive."
With all of this in mind, I set out to go and tell the people I cared for or were significant in my life. Surprisingly, when we put our minds to the task, we will remember acts of love, compassion, special effort made on our behalf, generosity and so much more.
The difference is NOT to view them with laziness, or dismiss them as ordinary everyday things.
The last time I saw and spoke with Max Soliven was the first time I chose to see him on purpose. Unlike the many Tuesdays in the past, I chose to SEE Manong Max with a very special reason. To thank him and express my gratitude.
I arrived at the Tuesday Club meeting not sure if he would be there. But as I pulled into the EDSA Shangri-La driveway, there he was alighting from his SUV. When I told him I was there specially to see him, Manong Max wasn’t quite sure how to react.
Decades of being a Journalist trained him to be cautious, to expect the worst but hope for the best. He was obviously relieved when I simply told him "I just wanted to say thank you, Tito Max. For your generosity, for trusting me and giving me the privilege to be a columnist in the STAR."
As expected he tried to water down the eecky-gooey moment. But I was determined to make him understand the entire point. He did an act of kindness and inspired me by bringing me into the Philippine STAR family.
He particularly asked me to write about ‘HUMAN INTEREST.’ At the beginning I sort of wondered why? With an entire section of heavy hitters, wouldn’t that make me "the peace loving freak", the overly spiritual preacher"? But Max Soliven knew something only a veteran could know.
He saw a need, he saw a heart, he saw opportunity. That in essence is why more than half of what I write on CTALK is reflective, inspirational and sometimes "spiritual." All because Max Soliven knew that while strong medicine is often needed, sometimes inspiration does more for the soul.
I explained to Tito Max the lessons I learned from the book. He paused for a moment and agreed. "That’s correct. One never knows how long life is." He asked for the title and author of the book, hoping to buy it that day.
I doubt if he ever got around to reading it. Perhaps it was unnecessary for him to go "Chasing Daylight." Having run out of daylight, I know he is now in God’s light.
Some corporations have taken an early start just to dispense with the mad rush by holding parties for the media and clients this week.
For me, it begins when my wife Karen DEMANDS to have my consistently postponed and delayed list of people we WANT or MUST give presents to.
I manage to avoid the pain and difficulty associated with having to choose who gets a gift and who gets a card when we decided to support an orphanage for several years. We simply decided on the amount, gave it to the orphanage, then sent out cards who were ALL named as donors.
This went well for several years until the orphanage closed down. Not for lack of funding but actually for lack of orphans. The British couple moved back to the UK and decided to make time for their own grandchildren.
This year we’re not giving out stuffed toys sewn to hand painted backgrounds, we’re not giving out the legendary apple crumbles that softened many hearts to sell vintage cars.
This year we’re launching "THE FUTURE ON WHEELS."
Next time you’re out of town, maybe this weekend, just watch how far many school children have to walk going to school and returning home. My personal estimate was about 3 to 6 kilometers.
However a recent article put the national average closer to 10 kilometers daily. Add to this the possibility that they eat the equivalent of only two meals to what us urban dwellers eat, then throw in the low quality footwear, and finally weather conditions like 4 to 6 months of rainy season.
We experimented by providing mountain bikes for a couple of kids. The change in their lives was immediate. Aside from the expected glee, the high schoolers were home earlier, did their errands faster, got to school and back home with more energy.
Considering their poverty, they won’t have to buy shoes as often, and they reduced the potential for weather related sickness.
That’s phase one.
The next phase is what we jokingly call our own version of "Victory liner." Being a member of Victory Christian Fellowship we discovered that much like the states, many people are wanting to go to church. But they’re either too poor, too far, too old, or alone.
For 400 pesos or what would amount to a pre-paid cell phone load, we assisted nearly 20 kids to attend church. They discovered a totally different world, a world that was fun, in church. That happened several Saturdays since. We now have a Sunday run for their parents.
By giving a ride, we serve them. By bringing them to church they meet God. So if this Christmas you get a card and not a gift, just remember, you invested in the future.