MANILA, Philippines — Disney has such a massive trove of intellectual property that it is willing to squeeze out any idea to make a feature film about it, even for its numerous theme park attractions.
When it comes to such adaptations, nothing will come close to the success of "Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl" even if its sequels raked in more money.
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The studio has attempted the feat before and since with other attractions like "Tower of Terror," "The Country Bears," "Tomorrowland," most recently "Jungle Cruise," and as most people will remember 2003's "Haunted Mansion" starring Eddie Murphy.
Disney has given the attraction another go and this time has tapped LaKeith Stanfield, Rosario Dawson, Owen Wilson, Tiffany Haddish, Danny DeVito, and Chase Dillon as the reluctant inhabitants of the titular mansion.
Dawson's Gabbie enlists the help of Stanfield's Ben (a paranormal tour guide and ex-astrophysicist), Wilson's Father Kent (a priest), Haddish's Harriet (a medium), and DeVito's Bruce (a college professor) to help figure out the spooks of her new house that just won't leave them alone — and the answer is supposed to be terrifying.
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Granted Darren Gilford's production design is very faithful to the original attraction, people will recognize iconic features like ghosts dancing in the ballroom and Madame Leota's seance room (with Oscar winner Jamie Lee Curtis portraying the crystal ball-trapped medium).
But even with actors like Stanfield, Wilson, and DeVito, the story never seems to settle on a proper theme, jumping from emotions to scares with sprinkled comedy in between that only comes off as muddled.
It's a shame because Stanfield is a growing force in drama and the grief subplot written for him should be a piece of cake, but its execution never seems to be fruitful enough. Not to mention that another Oscar winner Jared Leto is wasted as the movie's villain.
In fact the film's funniest moments come from the cameo actors such as Winona Ryder, Dan Levy, most especially Hasan Minhaj, and early on in the movie Filipino-American comedian Jo Koy.
This new reiteration is a visual improvement from the 2003 film, but there is hardly anything to rave about when so much potential becomes mere wisps.
No doubt Disney will regroup about how to tackle theme park attraction adaptations — there are still so many to try out — so hopefully it can bag more tickets then.
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