A brief lesson in men's swimwear

MANILA, Philippines - It’s the middle of summer, and you have nothing to wear for the beach trip you’ve been looking forward to besides option number one: a pair of boardshorts you first had when you still thought that the little plastic comb that came with it was actually for your hair. And option two: a pair of skimpy swimming trunks that somehow always surfaces from your disarray of a closet even when you’re not looking for them. First option sounds good, if you’re a pro-surfer, an enthusiast of the whole “hang ten” culture (and actually do surf), a wake-boarder, or a big scary MMA fighter. A little trivia: The extra length of boardshorts actually serve a purpose: To keep your hair from being pulled off of your legs while you’re sitting on a freshly waxed surfboard, waiting for the waves, brah! Option two is just a definite no go, unless you’re training for a triathlon on that same day. Even then, consider it to still be very heinous. Please do not rock the hammock.

Green means go: Details, clean lines and a classic shape to last you at least three summers at Orlebar Brown, $240

The theme for swimwear for men this summer should definitely be appropriateness. Appropriate for activities, your age, as well as in length since you’ll be out in public and don’t want to scandalize anyone. You will also want a pair of shorts that are cut a little above the knee or just above the knee; not too baggy though, since that makes the wearer look shorter and sloppy. In addition, aim for a pair that will still look good when paired with a lightweight oxford shirt or a real vintage tee when you decide to grab some lunch at that nice restaurant after a quick swim (be sure that your shorts are swimmable and dry quickly).

If I had written this article a few years back, I would have been met with puzzled looks, scowls of disbelief, shaking heads of disapproval, and resounding “that’s not cool, bro’s” but luckily, we’re out of the dim ages and in the brand-spanking-new world of social media, information and the latest and greatest trends brought to us by our favorite bloggers, guilty pleasure viewings of lookbook.nu (peg, what peg?) and your favorite brands. Consequently, there is no excuse for being oblivious to the pressing matter of shorts length. (Lawyers, surgeons, doctors, and other high-risk occupations excused, of course.) To look good this summer, impress the girls, your friends and yourself with what the local and foreign retailers have to offer (and now that I have your attention), take some time to look at old photographs online of surfers from the ‘50s and the ‘60s or, better yet, the vintage section of Tumblr and maybe you’ll understand why that time truly was the golden era of surfing. I guarantee you, it’ll set the tone for your new summer set. It’s always a good idea to mix in style with history, a little classic spin on your clothing choices; let Peter Cole, Fred Van Dyke, and the legends of surf’s past propel your style quotient forward.

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