When life throws us a curve ball, it stops us in our tracks, sometimes even making us feel paralyzed. We can’t help but feel frustrated or lost, and we ask ourselves, “Paano ba to?!”
Some of the country’s most inspiring personalities share with us little nuggets of wisdom for different things we may be going through in our lives.
1. For those who feel like they have not achieved anything in life yet, advice from Boy Abunda:
“It’s a journey, it’s a long process, it takes a while. You have to be cautious. You cannot be a whiner. There are people who are never happy with anything. May mga pagkakataon din tayo sa buhay na may mga bagay na hindi ka masaya, pero kailangan mong gawin, kasi kailangan kang mabuhay. Ako, there were things in the past that I did and was not happy about. Pero pag nililingon ko, sinasabi ko sa sarili ko, ‘Ah, yun pala ang dahilan.’ For me to be able to appreciate where I am now.
“This is my final advice. Do what you think is right, in terms of planning. You’re not steady, you’re moving on and you’re moving forward. But remember: Be kind to yourself.”
2. For those who want to be more confident when speaking with other people, advice from Iza Calzado:
“Lahat naman yata tayo may moments na kulang tayo sa self-esteem. The first thing that I’ve learned is to remind myself na lahat ng tao, nagkakamali. It lessens the burden of ‘I have to get it right, I have to impress them.’ Self-esteem you gain by experience. Pag bata ka, find something that you can probably be good at, or something that makes you feel good about yourself. Working out? Soccer? Biking? Anything. When you have a conversation with somebody, you bring something new to the table. And one more thing, hindi ako nahihiyang magtanong. For example, may mga kausap akong bankers or from finance, hindi ko naiintindihan! So I ask, ‘I’m sorry, I don’t know much about what you do, so please tell me about it?’ And it makes you a person with substance when you learn from your experiences and your mistakes.”
3. For those looking for a job but can’t seem to land one, advice from Karen Davila:
“That happened to me, too. When I graduated from college, I applied to different companies, and for some reason, hindi ako natatanggap. My advice is this: You have to be very aggressive, you have to pursue it talaga. Hindi lang yan basta nakaupo ka dun, iinterviewhin, we’ll call you. You have to sell your ‘self.’ ‘Sir, give me a chance. I’ll intern, I’ll assist, I really want the job badly.’ And you have to pray. You have to wait for God to lead you also to the right job. Sometimes, may gusto tayo, pero hindi pala yun ang best plan ni Lord for us.
“Some applicants think it’s one sided: I apply, I wait for the answer. But be pro-active. If no one is accepting you yet, be pro-active in exposing yourself, involving yourself in different groups, you’ll meet people and build connections.”
4. For those still figuring out what career path they should take, advice from Anthony Pangilinan:
“CENTS is five things to help you figure out what you should be doing. C is contribution. Ask yourself, ‘All my life, saan ba ako nakapag-contribute?’ Is it giving advice? You could be a counselor. When you cook, does everyone love it? You have to take note of your area of contribution. E is excellence. Especially if you have big competitors or you want to go global, kailangan may standards. You ask yourself, ‘Sa dami ng pwede kong gawin, saan ba ako nag-e-excel?’ N is natural gift. Like Gary Valenciano. He never studied, but he plays the keyboard. Ouido, what they call it? Lahat ng tao, ouido in something. Sa pagluluto? Sa pagsasayaw? You are a natural in something. T is turn on. Saan ka masaya? Kahit hindi ka bayaran gagawin mo? Too many people are dead men and women walking in the corporate world, they’re wondering why they’re not selling, they’re not getting promoted — because there’s no joy, no passion! What turns you on? Finally, S is spirit leading. This is very personal. You can call it your values, your conscience, your gut feel. Where is your spirit leading you? If it makes CENTS to you, it makes sense to do.”
5. For those choosing between a practical job and their dream job, advice from Atom Araullo:
“I think I found my dream job, and it’s also practical. I didn’t start out wanting to become a journalist or a reporter, I was just taking a break from Physics and I wanted to try it out. I think it’s not a question of knowing right away if your job is your dream job — but finding your passion in the job that you have. People have different circumstances and it’s a little bit out of touch when people say, ‘You only live once, go for your dream job,’ because a lot of us have practical considerations. If you have a good job that you see reasonable growth in, you can be passionate in that job. If what you’re really, really passionate about is not in your job, then make it so that your job supports your passion and you don’t have to choose. At least you have a stable job that will support your passion. Don’t think that you are not leading the life you envisioned for yourself just because you have to work hard at the job that you have.”
6. For those who feel like giving up, advice from Pia Wurtzbach:
“You should just keep going. Hindi mo alam, baka last hurdle mo na pala yun, then makukuha mo na yung hinihintay mo. Kung para sa iyo yan, mabibigay yan sa iyo, but also, in the right time. May mga moments talaga na iisipin mo, ‘Ito ba talaga? Am I wasting my time, my effort, my money?’ Always remember, why are you there in the first place? What even made you try in the first place? And if you’ve made it this far already, sasayangin mo pa ba yun? You’ve worked so much already for something, that’s more reason for you not to give it up right away. Because for every failure, we learn something, and we grow even more, and we master things even more, and that’s how we get to our ultimate goal. Its also about how hardworking you are, and how badly you want it.”
7. For those who need to deal with “toxic” people, advice from Piolo Pascual:
“It’s hard to tell people off or to tell a person something that would offend him or her. I had the tendency to just walk away without even confronting the situation, and in the long run, it becomes worse for the person because you were not a true friend. I’ve learned to appreciate another person’s problems and situation, and become more compassionate. If I have issues, I set it aside. I do the sandwich technique — you say the good thing first, then the constructive criticism, then something good again. You’ll make that person feel that you’re not looking down on him, you show that person that you’re concerned and you care. It will be easier for you to have peace when you walk away, if you have to walk away.”
8. For those who want to know how to stay positive, advice from Toni Gonzaga:
“Every day when you wake up, you have two options. You can choose to start it on a positive note, or you can choose to dwell on what’s wrong, what’s missing. Remind yourself and program your mind, ‘It’s going to be a great day! I’m going to receive my breakthrough!’ And even if it takes you many days of waking up before you get there, somehow, some day, you will. You have to fight for your happiness — you have to choose na magiging maganda ang araw mo, na magiging maganda ang buhay mo.
“Sabi nga nila, ‘It takes one thousand words to uplift you, and it only takes one word to bring you down.’ You have to be careful when you are talking to yourself because you are listening. What you are putting in your heart and in your mind, you are planting seeds. If you are planting negative thoughts, negative words, they will grow and become a tree in your heart. Always remember that your heart is fertile soil. Whatever it is that you plant will grow.”
9. For those who want to move on after a relationship ends, advice from Angelica Panganiban:
“Siguro isha-share ko kung paano nakatulong sa akin yung mga ginawa ko. Matigas kasi ang ulo ko, wala akong pinakinggan noon sa friends or family ko. Ikaw lang talaga ang makakaalam kung kailan kaya mo na. Yung pinakamalaking nakatulong sa akin ay acceptance. Laging maglalaro yung isip mo na, ‘Okay pa kami nun, tapos biglang ganito na lang.’ Nagstart ako na tanggalin yun sa isip ko. Inisip ko na talagang, ganun eh. Hindi talaga kayo para sa isa’t isa. Wag mong ipilit sa sarili mo na baka may hope. Acceptance talaga. The rest, susunod na lang—mararamdaman mo yung forgiveness, titigilan mo na ang pag-blame sa sarili mo, mawawala yun galit mo. Mas malaya ka.
Ngayon kasi nasa stage ako na binabalik ko yung time na nawala sa sarili ko, sa mga friends ko na hindi ko pinapansin noon. Mas peaceful ngayon ang lahat ng ginagawa mo. Ang sarap pala maging single. Hindi lahat ng single ay malungkot!”
10. For those who want to find their passion in life, advice from Francis Kong:
“First of all, I will have to be a little bit philosophical: How do you define passion? A lot of people will think passion is something you love doing or you are happy doing. Actually, that’s not it. When you look at the origin for the word ‘passion’, it comes from the Old Latin word for suffering. That’s why you have Mel Gibson coming out with the movie, The Passion Of The Christ. In other words, the essential philosophy of passion is something you are willing to sacrifice and work for, knowing that the end result will bring you what you want. If you’ve been trying and then quitting your ‘passions,’ my question to you is, why? Could it not be because you quit too soon? Or maybe because there is a misplaced understanding that because you love doing something, that becomes your passion. But you may not be willing to go through the pain, the sacrifices, the challenges that come with it.”
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We all could use words of wisdom from time to time! These are just a few pieces of advice you might want to try out, should you or anyone you know be going through the same thing. At the end of the day, when you have your own ‘Paano ba to’ moments, ask people you trust for advice, read up about it, and make your decisions from there.
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Message me @iamsuperbianca or watch the full versions of these #PaanoBaTo videos on my Youtube channel.