I have realized that in our rainbow journey toward the realization of personal goals, we cannot make choices based only on our security and safety. Nothing is safe. In the world of work, nothing is safe. In the world of human emotions, nothing is safe. In the world of friendship... firm, strong friendship, nothing is safe that is not to say that anything ever was, or that anything worth achieving ever should be. And it is not good to make a decision simply because it is safe. Things of value seldom are. It could be unsafe to have a child and yet we wholeheartedly embrace pregnancy. It could be unsafe to make a commitment to something or someone, and yet we commit ourselves totally, irrevocably many times – it is the very essence of an unlimited life, not the other way around. It is not safe to challenge the status quo, yet we have plunged into it many a time. As we endeavored to undertake the very difficult and complex task to demonopolize and liberalize the telecom sector of our country, we knew it was not safe. It is not safe to choose work that has not been done before. There will always be someone there to stop you. None of the things of real value are simply safe.
It must be great to be young today, for the youth, when lighted and alive and given a supportive chance, are strong for struggle. Edsa II proved that. There are new adventures. It has become increasingly easy as I’ve gotten older, to drown in nostalgia. In fact, we can almost measure where we are in life by the degree to which we have begun looking back rather than ahead. Some among the very old lose themselves in the past presumably on the ground that they no longer care or dare to look ahead. Some among the very young lose themselves entirely in the future, presumably on the ground that there is always promise in the unknown. Both I think are illusions. Time does not pass – we do, hurtling across the face of a continuum, so fast, that this knowledge should keep us alive. It is good however to remember what Oliver Wendell Holmes said: "Through our great good fortune, in our youth, our hearts were touched with fire." I’d like to add to that by saying: "That fire is only the start, for to keep it there throughout a lifetime is the great secret of one’s good life."
I have said this a number of times in some of my speeches, as regards what makes for success. I have said that I firmly believe there is only one very simple answer. You have to do in your life and with your life, what turns you on. Anything else is a waste of time. If you know where your own button is, press it. We were not put on earth to be clones of our parents or our siblings. The only way anybody succeeds truly, is to love what he’s doing.
One such person who however got turned on by the profession of his forebears; one young person who has so brilliantly plunged himself into the profession of dentistry, bears special mention – Dr. Joel Alcantara Mendoza, nephew of my late dentist and friend, Dr. Roger Alcantara, who during his lifetime, ran what is perhaps one of the most modern dental clinics in the country today. When he passed away just a little over a year ago, it stunned his whole army of friends for he had many, and relatives too. I of course asked myself: "Who will be my dentist now that Roger is gone?" Not too long ago, I had a dental problem, and just as naturally as ever, proceeded to make an appointment at Dr. Alcantara’s clinic. I had already dialed the number when I remembered Roger had already passed on, and then I was told that the lead dentist in the clinic right now was his young nephew from New York, just 35 years of age. My abiding faith in the young professional plus the fact that I hate to try out new surroundings impelled me to go to the same clinic.
I was not prepared for the outstanding professionalism and superlative efficiency of the young Dr. Joel Alcantara Mendoza and his team of young lady dentists: Drs. Michelle S. Jao and Reina Sabal, both extremely efficient and good-looking, and a very caring helper of a dental nurse in the person of Jonie Samson, not to mention the attentive receptionist Elnor. All of them form the new excellent team that ministers to the patient with such dedication and concern and this by itself would make my friend Roger Alcantara smile his big smile from up there. The care and gentleness I got from them confirmed my conviction that indeed the young professional can be superlative.
Dr. Joel Mendoza’s dental experience is impressive though, and gives the patient great comfort: New York University for Orthodontics; NYU Eye and Ear Infirmary for Orthognatic Surgery; N.Y. Brookdale Hospital for dental implanting. He was an undergraduate teacher of Orthodontics in the mid 1990s. In the West Coast, just out of school, he was a lab technician at the Redwood City Dental Center and an Associate Dentist at the Kirkham and Polachek Dental Center. His professional experience brought him to Dr. Braz Olivera’s Dental Clinic in Portugal where he undertook studies on implants. Perhaps his most memorable stint was at his late uncle, Dr. Roger Alcantara’s clinic in Makati where he undertook two years of training under Roger, for which reason he has decided to come back to the Philippines and provide the benefits of his excellent experience even at such a young age, here in his home country, the Philippines.
The most important thing going for the young Dr. Mendoza, however, is his great love for his work. He may have become a dentist because of his affinity to his forebears in the same profession; like osmosis, dentistry just poured over him, but he just happens to love his work and shows this infinitely through the smile he gives you which shines through his surgical mask, as he bends over and very deftly begins to give the patient the most painless root canal ever. He told me that when he was very young his playground was his grandfather’s dental lab which in the decade of the ’60s was regarded as the best in the Philippines. Aside from his late uncle, Dr. Roger Alcantara, there are many other relatives who are dentists and doctors. According to Dr. Joel, because of his eye for beauty, he finds it such a challenge to "restore the beauty and natural look of a person’s smile." This is his "passion, his profession and recreation" all wrapped up in one. At age 35, Dr. Joel Mendoza says it is his "life." That’s probably the reason why he remains unmarried and uncommitted up to now.
The young Dr. Mendoza is extremely lucky to find self-fulfillment in his profession which has eluded quite a number of men and women even at age 50 or 60 who, like fools however proclaim to the world how self-fulfilled they are. There is, may I tell them, that natural illusion of self-fulfillment. Many times I hear women say: "I can’t do this because I’m trying to fulfill myself," or "This man isn’t fulfilling me," or "I can’t feel free unless I fulfill myself." The paradox is that the only sure road to freedom and true personhood is self-abandonment. To write a book is an act of self-abandonment. I have a friend who has written three brilliant books on the philosophy of life...he has, throughout the length of time it has taken him to write them, been in a state of self-abandonment. To love a man is an act of self-abandonment; to love him totally and selflessly may put one in helpless self-abandonment however. To listen to a friend, really and truly listen, is an act of self-abandonment.
Dr. Joel Mendoza is not only self-fulfilled but indulges in acts of self-abandonment as he undertakes the healing of a nasty tooth, and even as he explains why it could hurt a little bit. And the young man will certainly strive for success and excellence as so many young professionals are earnestly doing right now. Let me tell them that we live in a time when success is too often measured in numbers and letters. Think of the measure we assign to people’s lives that we equate with value: salary; what our homes are worth; the number of job offers received; titles of all sorts. It’s a mistake, I am sure you will agree with me, to think that numbers or letters in themselves are measures of success. They describe certain forms of achievement, that’s all. It is ridiculous to think that a P12 million-a-year investment banker is more successful than an elementary school teacher who makes just enough to live on. It is equally ridiculous to think that a mother who has a career outside the home is more important than a woman who chooses to be at home with her children.
When we try to quantify success this way, we sell ourselves and everyone else, short. Sometime in 1989, I heard John Brademas, the president of New York University then, speak on "The Difference Between Success and Excellence." Success, said Brademas, is measured externally... by comparison with others for instance. Success is often beyond our control, and moreover, is perishable. Excellence, on the other hand, is an internal quality, a consequence in large measure of the capacity and of the commitment of an individual. Excellence therefore endures.
And when we work hard, in fact very hard at it as Dr. Joel Alcantara Mendoza and his team are doing in the exercise of the healing profession they have embarked on, a profession that has certainly turned them on, then, Brademas’ words that "Excellence is doing your best at what you do best," will ring true everyday of their lives.