First Ladies in waiting: Supportive wives, loving mothers

MANILA, Philippines - Under the Constitution, the job of the First Spouse, traditionally a woman, is to perform ceremonial duties for the state and carry out projects that complement the work of the president. But most of all, she provides emotional support to the chief executive to make sure he weathers the demands of governance.

Today being Mothers’ Day, The STAR pays tribute to four women, one of whom could be the country’s next first lady. We look at their roles in shaping their men’s lives and their aspirations for the country. 

Cynthia Villar: Tough politician, loving mother

Las Piñas Rep. Cynthia Villar, wife of Nacionalista Party presidential candidate Sen. Manny Villar, projects strength at the political front, but is regarded by her family as a loving mother.

Cynthia prides herself in having kept her family intact despite living a public life.

“We are a loving family. Manny has the most successful family life among all the presidentiables,” she said during the party’s miting de avance in Vitas, Tondo last Friday. “We have maintained our family life in our 53 years of marriage because we have kept tradition in the family, like spending quality time together.”

Cynthia raised her children to be resilient against intrigues.

“I don’t shield them (her children) from intrigues. My family can overcome intrigues because each of us is strong individually to meet all the problems that will come our way,” she said.

Cynthia and Manny have been sweethearts since they were 18 years old and students at the University of the Philippines in Diliman. 

During their marriage, they had three children, Paolo and Camille who are helping run the family’s real estate empire, and Mark, who is running for congressman in Las Piñas.

Manny said no matter how busy they all are, they find time to vacation abroad during Christmas and New Year. They also set aside family time every week. 

Camille, the youngest of the Villar children, said her mother is strong-willed and meticulous, but at the same time, very loving.

“She is tough when she needs to be,” Camille said. “My mom is really loving and caring; she is very loyal, even to her friends. She stands up for her principles.”  

She said her mother, despite her simplicity, taught them to live well and is very particular with order and cleanliness at home.

“My mom is very thoughtful, very organized. Even if she has a lot to do, she still remembers how many towels are available at home. She makes it a point to put the house in order,” Camille said.

Aside from being thorough with housekeeping, Camille said her mom remembers to attend their school activities.

“I remember she came to my class for one day and became a teacher. She read a story for my classmates and prepared giveaways for them. She really went the extra mile,” she said.

Cynthia, 60, is a three-term Las Piñas representative and Manny’s key partner in the family’s real estate business.  

Camille said her mom and dad are perfect for each other because they complement each other in many ways.  

“Some of my dad’s weaknesses are my mom’s strength. They draw strength from each other,” she said.

Camille recalls that during one of her mother’s birthdays, her dad praised her saying, “In my life, everything that I have achieved, everything that I’ve done, I believe that half of that was because of my wife.”

Kate Gordon: Knowing her place in politics

For Katherine “Kate” Gordon, wife of Bagumbayan candidate Richard Gordon, being a politician has always been harder than being a homemaker, but she has not regretted it.

“It’s more challenging to be a politician than a mother and wife because you have to be at the beck and call of the people 24 hours a day. You always have to be strong. As a wife and mother, I am myself,” said the 62 year-old Kate.

Kate served as mayor of Olongapo City from 1998 to 2001. Before that, she was the representative of the first district of Zambales from 1987 to 1995.

As a politician, she focused on programs on law and order, and the delivery of social services.

As Olongapo mayor, Kate hired more women to work for the city government to encourage them to be independent.

Now retired from politics, Kate says she is busy reconnecting with her four children - Renee Victoria, Amanda Olivia, Leonard James and Brian Patrick - as well as her 11 grandchildren. 

“I could never really give them my full time and attention... I have now given them my whole heart and soul. Now they know that they are my number one priority. I will not trade my family for anything,” she said.

Kate admits that when she was still active in politics, she spent more time in meetings than with her children.

“My children were complaining that there was never any time to be private, especially when they go home to Olongapo. Our home was open 24 hours a day,’ she says. “But they never showed other people their resentment. They were very respectful.”

Despite the sacrifices she had to make, Kate says she was grateful for the opportunity to work as a public servant. 

“I was not after the titles. I love being with the people. But I now realize that in this point of my life, I want to be with my family,” she said.

Kate married Dick on Nov. 5, 1969. She was 21 and he was 24. At that time, Sen. Gordon was working as a brand manager for Procter and Gamble.

She said her marriage to a politician made her stronger.

“It opened up my world because if I had married an ordinary man, my life would not have been so interesting. With Dick, whenever you wake up, wow, it is another interesting day,” she said.

Kate advises the wives of young politicians to decide on the role they want to play.

“Know your place. Will you be an asset or liability to your husband? Learn to respect your husband, the people working with him and the people he works for,” she said. 

She said if her husband wins the election, she would not involve herself in government transactions.

“The First Spouse should not be involved in policy-making. Spouses (of the president) should not be involved in transactions,” she said.

Sister Dory Villanueva:  Standing by her man

When Adoracion “Sister Dory” Villanueva married Bangon Pilipinas Party candidate Eduardo “Bro. Eddie” Villanueva, she had no idea he was a labor activist.

Life with Eddie has never been easy. Even during the early years of their marriage, she never seemed to have him all to herself.

Dory recalls that three days after they returned to Bocaue, Bulacan from their honeymoon in Baguio, some problematic workers of a noodle factory went to their house and sought Eddie’s help.

After hearing their story, Eddie joined the workers in their strike and slept on the streets, going home in the morning to eat bread and coffee.

“At times, he would even take the bread with him and bring food for the workers. When I objected, he explained that we should give the food to the workers because they already had no work and no means to buy food,” Dory said.

He had not even settled the labor row with the noodle factory when he joined the cause of workers from a textile company and a lumber store.

Because of his activities, Eddie received kidnap threats and was imprisoned for two days. Dory’s brother offered to bail him out of prison but Eddie refused to leave his cell until the other arrested workers were released.

Dory married Eddie on June 5, 1971. She was 25 and he was 24. She has stood by his side for the past 38 years. 

“When I married him, I did not know that he was an activist. All I knew was that he was a professor of Economics at the Polytechnic University of the Philippines,” she said.

Dory said Eddie swept her off her feet with love letters. She said she had always wanted to marry a man who is smarter than her.

Dory, who graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science Major in Elementary Education from the National Teachers College, was impressed with his wit.

Now 64, she admitted there had been several times during the early years of their marriage when she seriously thought of leaving Eddie because she could no longer tolerate his activities.

“I began thinking that he loved the workers more than he loved me,” she said. “I imagined that when I got married, I would live a quiet and happy life.”

Looking back, however, Dory thanks God for bringing her and Eddie together because it brought them back to the faith.

Dory said Eddie was an atheist before becoming a Born Again Christian and, eventually, founder of the Jesus is Lord (JIL) Church Worldwide.

The couple put up the JIL Colleges Foundation because of Dory’s background in education. 

Dory and Eddie have four children. The eldest, Eduardo Jr., is running for re-election as mayor of Bocaue, Bulacan. The younger son, Citizens Battle Against Corruption (CIBAC) party-list representative Joel Villanueva, is finishing his last term.

If CIBAC wins this upcoming election, his brother-in-law lawyer Sherwin Tugna, husband of his younger sister Joni, would replace him. The youngest daughter Joni now runs the family-owned Zoe Broadcasting Co. 

Dory is proud of her children’s accomplishments. She said she has always taught them to be “crowns” and not “thorns” to their parents.

Dory describes herself as a “very supportive wife.” When Eddie told her he was running for president again, she instantly opposed it. 

“I told him are you out of your mind? After all that happened in 2004 you still want to run for president? All the members of the family were against it,” she said.

In the 2004 presidential elections, Eddie ran for president but lost. He claimed a plan was launched to make sure his votes would not exceed two million.

Dory changed her mind after she chanced upon 1 Chronicles 17:4-8, a portion of which reads “This you must say to my servant David: This is the word of Yahweh Sabaoth: I took you from following the sheep, to be leader of my people Israel. I have been with you wherever you have gone, and I have defeated all your enemies as you advanced. I will make your name as great as the name of the greatest on earth.”

Since Eddie started campaigning, she has taken the responsibility of packing his clothes, medicine, and food for the sorties.

She also regularly calls up Eddie’s nephew and assistant Jake to check on the progress of the campaign and Eddie’s condition, occasionally getting upset when she finds out that Eddie skips meals because of their tight schedule.

On her own, she campaigns for Eddie in nearby provinces in Central Luzon, especially in women’s groups and public markets.

If her husband gets elected, Dory said she has no plans of assuming any government position, but said she would like to work with the Department of Education to improve the learning system in the country.

Dunia de dos Reyes: It’s God’s will that I’m here

Dunia Valenzuela de los Reyes, wife of Ang Kapatiran Party candidate John Carlo “JC” de los Reyes, believes God brought her to the country to meet her husband.

Dunia was born on May 31, 1976 in Lagos, Nigeria to her Italian-Brazilian mother Teresinha and Filipino engineer Eduardo Valenzuela. She has two brothers, Sonny and Eduardo Jr.

Her father belongs to the prominent Valenzuela clan of Malolos, Bulacan and Santaromana clan of Luna, La Union.

She grew up and studied in the city of Brusque, Santa Catarina in Brazil, where she attended high school in Escola Estadual Dom Joao Becker.

“When I arrived in the Philippines, I considered it the greatest challenge in my life because I was a total stranger,” she said. “I suffered culture shock and I wanted to return to Brazil but later I realized that it was a call of God to serve the Filipino people.”

Dunia originally wanted to become a veterinarian because she loves animals, but pursued Mass Communications at St. Paul College in Quezon City. She married JC when she was in her third year of college.

Dunia and JC were introduced in December of 1996, during the rehearsals for a play directed by Fr. James Reuter for the Philippine centennial celebration. Dunia was the understudy for the role of Josephine Bracken. JC’s father, Sonny, who played the role of national hero Jose Rizal, told Dunia about his son.

The two were married in January 1998 and have three children: Gabriel, Santiago, and Barbara Therese.

After marriage, she devoted her time to being a full-time homemaker and assisting the poor in Olongapo City where JC was councilor.

“I have always been a hands-on mother and housewife. I kept myself busy at home, planting, cooking which I love, and teaching my eldest boy who, for a time, was home schooled. I teach yoga as community service, and paint when I have free time,” Dunia said.

If she becomes first lady, she plans to create a program for children with autism.

At the moment, however, she believes it will take a miracle for her husband to win the elections.

She is glad, however, that her husband received strong support from the clergy during the campaign season. She said there were also times when assistance arrived when they were low on campaign funds.

“ I believe that all the events that unfolded since I arrived in the country was the will of God and I am prepared for any eventuality. If we lose in the election, I will continue my advocacy to help the poor, my heart bleeds for them,” she said.

Dunia also dreams of setting up an agency that will address the needs of the urban poor.

Meanwhile, Senate President Pro Tempore Jinggoy Estrada yesterday wished his mother, Dr. Loi Ejercito, good health.

“I hope she will still guide us even if we have problems and even if we are already old. I hope she will continue to provide guidance for my father (former president Joseph Estrada). I wish her long life,” he said. - Christina Mendez, Mike Frialde, Evelyn Macairan and Perseus Echeminada