It’s the love month and nothing could be more fitting a time to learn how relationships stay strong and last long. From always communicating, whether in good times and bad times, to separating the personal life from the public life, these TV and music celebrities offer a glimpse into how they make their marriages work, as gleaned from our interviews.
John Prats (7 years married to actress Isabel Oli): “You communicate always, whenever you’re down or happy. The problem rin kasi sometimes, when you’re happy, you can communicate but when you have a problem, you cannot. You should exert extra effort to communicate, especially when you have a problem, because that’s the way to fix things, you communicate, you compromise and do the action right after. You do the effort after. And so far, it’s been working for the both of us.
“Siguro din may mga couples, there’s a competition? With me and Liv, there’s no competition. Our roles are very clear, I’ll provide for them and she’ll take good care of the family and us. So, that’s why ang ganda ng dynamics naming dalawa. And we always put God at the center of our relationship. That’s why we know our relationship is strong… I’m very thankful to have a wife like her, I couldn’t ask for more.”
Carmina Villarroel (9 years married to actor Zoren Legaspi): “Thank God wala naman kaming pinagdaanan (marital problems). Yun lang, it’s just his pag-mo-motor and pagbibisikleta but I just think I have to deal with it (because) I don’t want to stop him, that’s his happiness. If he’s not happy, he’s not going to be happy at home.
“So, understanding nalang and respect. Siguro isa yun (sa mga) key ingredients to a lasting relationship because given na yun dapat meron kayong pagmamahal at tiwala sa isa’t isa. Dapat kasama din diyan ang respeto. And of course, prayers. Yun talaga ang magbubuklod sa inyong dalawa mag-asawa — ang dasal talaga. So lalo ngayon na naka-lock-in pa ako, hindi ko alam saan siya (Zoren) nagpupunta. But my prayer is he’ll be safe because God is always with him. Walang patid ang prayers ko na sana lagi siyang gabayan. That’s my ultimate prayer.”
Rachelle Ann Go (3 years married to businessman Martin Spies): “Every day is an adjustment. Kumbaga ngayon, we’re adjusting to how to take care of Lukas. How do we find time to spend time with each other, na kaming dalawa lang? We have to prioritize the marriage. Like yes, there’s a baby, but marriage is very important that it has to be solid for you to be the best parents. As a partner, wala akong marereklamo, he’s very kind, very patient, especially siguro sa mga moms maiintindihan, pag-wala kang tulog, mainit ulo mo talaga… During first few months (after giving birth) zombie mode talaga, autopilot, but Martin has been very supportive, whatever I need, he will give it to me — time to sleep, time to take a bath for an hour and time to go out with your friends, ako lang yung ayaw, I don’t wanna be away from Lukas.”
Yeng Constantino (7 years married to musician Victor Asuncion): “Me and my husband, hindi po siya ideal kung paano kami nagkakilala, or how we became together. Our background is Christian, so dapat (you) start as friends first. But sometimes the Lord will take you to a different story. So with us, we have been together for seven years and when we look back, parang sinasabi namin ng asawa ko, grabe yung first two years of our marriage. It was so hard, we really didn’t know each other. It was a risk that we took…
“I feel proud, I’ve grown so much as a person, as a woman, kasi ang dami naming differences na talagang nahasa kami sa isa’t isa. I learned respect and what it really means in the context of husband and wife. And to listen and to be patient and him as well, to be patient with me and with my growth. And now, sobrang matured na namin mag-asawa at nung anniversary namin, napaka-simple lang. We went camping and there were no flowers, no cake, walang anything. I was with my tropa… and we had a barbecue and just talked… I think that’s the (reflection) of maturity in our relationship. I feel contented and I feel happy. I’m not looking for anything extravagant… Yung talaga ang importante sa pagmamahal, yung kayong dalawa. So, I think nandun na kami sa level ng asawa ko.”
Michael V (28 years married to flight attendant-turned-producer Carol Bunagan): “We’re not perfect. It’s not that we don’t fight. Nagtatalo pa rin kami. We still argue. But there’s always something bigger than the both of us. More often than not, yun nalang iniisip namin. Ang daming tao na may mas malalaking problema, mas malaki yung iniintindi nila. May ibang tao nga, yung paghinga lang, yung one big breath, malaking bagay na sa kanila tapos magtatalo pa kami? Napaka-petty para sa mga blessings na natatanggap namin.”
Julius Babao (18 years married to TV host Christine Bersola): “A lot of marriages… may competition with the couple. Minsan, ‘pag nagiging successful yung babae, na-i-insecure yung lalake, di ba? Medyo nag-aaway sila because of that. It’s recognizing what would make your partner happy. Hindi lang yung puro ikaw. Kinakailangan i-respect mo yung magiging happiness ng partner mo, and you have to know the limits of each other’s patience. If feeling mo nagagalit na yung partner mo, ‘wag mo na sabayan. Yun ang natutunan ko dito eh. ‘Pag galit na ang asawa ko, atras na ako ng konti, ayoko na makipag-debate, because if you debate hahaba pa eh. There will be a time for talking about issues that need to be resolved. But to go head on at that very moment na galit ang bawat isa sa inyo, it won’t help. It’s better to have a break for a while and talk after.
“Plus, of course, allot time for your kids and family, hindi puro trabaho lang kasi baka at the end of the day, magulat ka nalang ang dami ng problema ang di mo nalalaman, napapansin at di mo na maayos kasi lumala na ang problemang iyon. So, it’s really giving time — extra time to your family. I would always have dinners with my family. Weekends are sacred, we have to be together always.”
Gloc-9 (17 years married to talent manager Thea Pollisco): “More than anything else, I believe magkaibang bagay yan (career and personal life)... I’m a very private person. Hindi mo makikita nilalagay ko anak ko sa social media at hindi ko hahayaan yung ibang tao mag-comment ng hindi maganda sa aking private life. I think that’s what’s important to me. When it comes to private life, yan talaga ang iniingatan ko. Maybe I can understand if super celebrity or artista ka, but that’s my stand — my family and private life should remain private. And it’s a choice. I don’t believe, ‘Oh, I found the right person.’ It’s a constant and conscious choice to be the right person.”