Shaq admits taking 'drug'

CEBU, Philippines – Shaquille O’Neal, known as the “Big Diesel,” “Big Cactus,” “Big Aristotle,” to basketball fans acknowledged taking enhancement performance drug.

Shaq admitted to taking large amount of a secret performance-enhancing recipe in a recent radio interview by Dennis Scott and Brando Wooly of Zone 790, Atlanta’s most popular sports radio.

Scott and Wooly asked if Shaq had ever taken performance-enhancing drugs. He said he had taken the Secret Performance Enhancement Cereal and described what it is made of.

“For all the little kids, the Performance Enhancement Cereal is you take the Frosted Flakes, and you take the Froot Loops, and you mix them together, and then you get some of them sliced bananas and you put them on that thing, and then you get a big old bowl. The kind of bowl if you pull out your mother says, ‘Boy, you better put that bowl back!’ And, then you pour that milk ... You better get a job eating all that milk.”

Problem is the concoction is not out in the market yet. – RBO (THE FREEMAN)