Etiquette on invitations

CEBU, Philippines - A good host attempts to give his guests plenty of notice. When he waits until the last minute to pull together a party he must accept the fact that his friends may already have other plans.

Two weeks lead time is appropriate for a dinner party. One week is sufficient for a more casual gathering.

Whether he offers his invitation in writing or by phone, he makes sure to answer all the questions his guests might logically have. For written invitation, a good host makes sure to include the nature of the party (cocktails, supper, brunch, a birthday party for Mary Jane, or whatever), the date, the hour, the address, specifics about what to wear, and the information his guests need in order to reply. If his guests will need instructions about parking, he includes those as well.

If a host needs an accurate headcount, he requests a reply by writing either "RSVP" or, more directly, "Please reply" at the bottom of his invitation, making sure to include his phone number. If his prospective guests have not responded by a reasonable time (forty-eight hours before the party), he may gracefully ask whether or not they plan to attend.

Invitations need not be elaborate. They may be handwritten, but, for larger parties, it is convenient to have them printed in quantity. Fill-in-the-blank invitation cards, adaptable to almost any occasion, are available at most stationery and card shops.