Marriage customs

CEBU, Philippines - I appreciate weekend travels because such give me the opportunity to flip through again the pages of “One-Year Devotional Study of Women in Scripture” by Ann Spangler and Jean Syswerda.

Though I purchased this book in 2002, its significance continues to stretch to today; even of perpetual use to both the buyer and the borrower.

The relevance takes root in the fact of the infallibility of the Bible. Also, it is an awesome book on stories of lovers and couples. However, the customs of marriage were far different in ancient biblical times from our own modern customs; thus, these have become the source of sorrow for some women of faith.

According to the Spangler-Syswerda compilation involving the issues hounding these women, seldom did a man or woman marry for love. Awww!

Jacob, for example, married both Rachel and her sister, Leah, a practice that was later forbidden by law (please check the 18th verse of Leviticus 18).

Usually, the bride and the groom were very young when they married. The bride was often only around 12 years old and the groom around 13. Their marriage was arranged by parents, and their consent was neither requested nor required. Even so, the compilation reads, “such marriages could prove to be love matches, like that between Isaac and Rebekah.”

It was learned that the marriage ceremony itself was usually very short, but the festivities connected with it could go on for many days. The groom dressed in colorful clothing would set out just before sunset, with his friends and attendants and musicians, for the home of the bride’s parents. There the bride would be waiting, washed and perfumed and bedecked in an elaborate dress and pieces of jewelry.

The bride and groom, according to Spangler, then lead the marriage procession through the village streets, accompanied by music and torchbearers, to the home of the parents of the groom. The feasting and celebration which begins that night, will often continue for seven days.

Says Syswerda: “God’s design for marriage to be between one husband and one wife was often not practiced in early biblical times. Leah shared her husband Jacob with not only her sister, Rachel, but their maids Zilpah and Bilhah.

Although polygamy was less common after the Exodus from Egypt, Gideon had a number of wives (please check Judges 8:30), and, of course, Solomon had many (1 Kings 11:3).

But, as the New Testament indicates, a union between one husband and one wife continues to be God’s design and desire (1 Timothy 3:2, 12; Titus 1:6).