Vanessa: Healer of Lonely Hearts

She was a meek, innocent girl named Ma. Socorro Caiban. Maricor to her family and friends. Then one day luck winked and transformed her into something completely different-a siren of the local airwaves. She became Vanessa, the phenomenal sexy voice on Cebu radio in the 80s.

The turning point came when a classmate brought her to a radio audition for drama talents. At the time, her prospects of finishing her college education had dimmed following the loss of her father's job. Being a drama talent, she thought, could be her shortcut to a media career.

But it was not really what she wanted to be. Her childhood dream was to become a foreign-service worker, or be in the diplomatic corps, or work for the United Nations. The young girl from Dumanjug had what it took to dream big. She was a consistent honor student in school. Her father had a stable job in a big mining company and her mother was a nurse. She was the eldest of five siblings, therefore the very first to tap into her parents' savings for the children's education.

Fate, however, had it another way for young Maricor. She didn't complain though. She thought that a radio job, at least, had some semblance of the one she really wanted. Radio is an industry with the power to affect masses of people. That was good enough for her, better than idling her time. And things worked quite well.

She quickly rose up the ranks in radio, from an ordinary extra to lead roles in drama plays in just a short time. The late drama writer and director Willy Cortes was her main mentor. He was also the one mostly instrumental in molding her into Vanessa. He taught her the sound and the disposition of someone who would be Cebu's love-and-romance radio counselor.

Her first - and biggest - signature show was Verboten, a daily one-hour dramatization of problems sent in by listeners. She partnered with a licensed medical doctor in giving advice on marriage and relationship problems. Frequently, the show dealt on "bedroom" issues. It was a big hit. And big trouble, too.

The local chapter of the Kapisanan ng mga Brodkaster sa Pilipinas (KBP) ordered the show to stop airing. There were complaints that the program was offensive to public morals and was a bad influence for minors, especially so because it aired at daytime. Verboten left air, but not Vanessa. In fact, the show's cancellation only heightened the fans' craving for her.

One avid listener pursued her relentlessly to the altar. The union produced three daughters. But it did not last. After two difficult decades, her marriage was annulled in 2001. Looking back, Vanessa has no regrets. Yet, she reflects, it was not a carefully-thought-of matter from the very start. She recalls how casually she took the whole thing at the time. "I should have studied it thoroughly well before jumping in," she says.

If it was someone else in her situation at the time, Vanessa would have surely advised: "Love is such an intoxicating emotion. When you are in love, it's hard to tell whether it's for real or just a transient feeling. So go slowly, be careful." But as always the case, one can't clearly see the picture when she's the one inside the frame.

It's sad how someone looked up to by many to save their turbulent marriages ends up losing her own. "I preferred losing a husband to losing my life," she reasons. It came to a point where the marital problem was already affecting her health, physical and mental. She was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. And considering the swiftness with which her annulment case was decided - in one year! - the marriage must have been really in such a bad shape.

In real life, Maricor is a far cry from her image as Vanessa during the Verboten days. She is, then and now, a wholesome, decent person. Precisely why she had to use a different name on radio, so that people will not to mistake her job for her person. "My parents are highly religious people," she explains. "My mother had lived long years in a monastery."

But she can't help the cross-identification. People who are in highly visible jobs, like in radio, are eventually seen as their job, not as their true character. Especially so when they're quite successful in what they do. Vanessa was one such people-she was an icon of sorts.

Today Maricor or Vanessa immerses herself in her flourishing networking business. She is presently a top sales producer with DynaPharm, an international natural-food-supplement company. She is also a licensed iridologist, regularly performing iris analyses - often for free - at the Radio Ministry office of Sto. Rosario Church. She has, too, a daily morning radio newscast on DYRB.

And she is still giving advices, although not anymore on love and romance like she used to. Radio hopefuls and neophytes go to her for tips on anything-voice-acting, news reporting, anything. She likes it. It makes her feel useful, and needed.

The radio lady who was Cebu's premiere "healer of lonely hearts" lives alone now. Her girls are all grown up and are having lives of their own. She rents a small place all to herself. Is she lonely? Maybe. She still longs for that special man-sincere, honest, romantic, with a good sense of humor, and quite physical as well. Quite a tall order. Will she ever find him? She hopes.

Meantime, perhaps it's Vanessa's turn to take some advice. Top-selling author Sarah Ban Breathnach has a nice theory about perfect mates: God wants to be our sweetheart. And once we fall in love and have an intimate relationship with Him, that's when He sends the right mate for us. It's as if God says, "I know you don't want to be alone on this lonely planet. I just wanted you to love me first."