The kindred spirit connection

The idea on twin flames and soulmates gnawed on me once again the moment I learned of Reese Witherspoon's latest screen-starrer "Just Like Heaven" (opposite actor Mark Ruffalo) as a doctor on this feel-good movie about falling in love, and the truth about the genuineness of the proddings of the chakra (the heart), twin flames and soulmates.

The idea of twin flames and soulmates may be absurd to some. With a serving of rationalization, you realize you definitely choose who you'll love or bond or connect with among a zillion acquaintances. But even a skeptic would somehow enjoy pondering on the concept of soulmates and the delight this could bring when one really finds his or her other half. So it has been said that the idea of a soulmate has both conscious or unconscious elements, so that even if we do not intellectually believe in such, the idea still affects us as many people openly and consciously yearn for a soulmate, believing that one person - the right person, that is! - is just somewhere out there waiting to be found.

Besides, I would want to continue discussing on love for those who find delight in this topic (as manifested by their text messages and a posted note in my e-box). These readers - phone numbers withheld - sent "12-Sept-2005 09:45:57 gudmorning. this is only about that pencil illustration on your freeman article. is that by john raynes?; 12-Sept-2005 08:28:39 Gud morning Eleanor. Ive jst finished reading ur article in d lifestyle section of freeman today. Im impressed by what u say about coelho's books. Ive read some of his buks but not yet the 11 minutes. Im a teacher in usjr. We r presently discussing about sex and sexuality. Is it possible 2 invite you as classroom resource speaker? - Tseko143; 12-Sept-2005 17:53:53 Hello, Eleanor, I read u article. R u a literary critic and a writer too? How old r u, if u dnt mind? R u married alrdy? Im askng coz ur views cud reflect ur status. - rowland; 12-Sept-2005 17:13:39 Ur column in d freeman LOVE AND SEX, dated today is very interesting. Cn u gve me more info bwt 8? - jake; (and this one is heart-warming because this person Killuazolbick I featured back then in this column has now gone to school after a little prodding and is into the habit of reading The Freeman) 12-Sept-2005 14:30:29 bro, gud pm. kmusta? kulba.a gyd sa imu page noh dli mn gyd ma wala ang yenyang (yin and yang) nga logo, ni skwela namn ko bro naa ko sa uv nag skol mao BZ na ang lyf; 13-Sept-2005 16:31:45: Hi! I'm ben. I read ur article at frman about paulo coelho. im ntrsted 2 met u & we b frnds.; 14-Sept-2005 12:44:19 - Iv read ur column. I dnt knw, bt i thnk we share a comon idea bout life, love & SEX. - xtian; 13-Sept-2005 10:14:43 - Just read ur article in freeman yestrday's issue about love and sex. I like that article (Anonymous); 13-Sept-2005 17:27:10 - Gud pm im ed always ko ga read sa imung column sa freeman im amaze sa inyung topic love&sex keep up da gud work god bless. And from my ebox i found this note from renz ryan: halu good day to you. i'm renz, 3rd year college.i hav just read your article about love and sex....eleven minutes. i do really love the topic.about love and in life in general."

Thanks, guys, for your feedback. Your responses provide teeth to the premise that love is at the core of our identity. In every human being there is a deep need for love - not only to be loved, but to give love, as well. This basic need is written all over our hearts.

Aside from the feedback, this article is also fueled by men like Ronald Kayuu who said to me he is very much a believer in soulmates as, according to him, everyone is connected to everything in this world because we all share in the same life force and we all come from one source, one love, one heart. This statement is contrary to what a grade school batchmate of mine Mark Rembrant Carredo who now works for Fairchild Semiconductors in Suzhou,China emailed me: "No.. there is no such thing as soulmates. Soulmates for me should be the perfect couple. I don't believe in perfect couple. Depende ra gyud na sa usag-usa how they can work out their differences and 'indifferences'. Tanan gyud tingali couple moagi gyud ug away. This can either strenghten further the relation or ruin it."

Back to the idea of soulmates. The concept of soulmates arose from Greek mythology. According to the story, our ancestors once had two heads and four arms. They did something to offend a god so that they were punished. The god split them down the middle, resulting in the creation of humans. As a punishment, we are condemned to spend our lives searching for the other half, our soulmates. It has been said that various religions and spiritual paths believe in reincarnation and the concept of karma. Through reincarnation, soulmates may spend many lifetimes together in past lives. Other spiritual methods of searching for one's soulmate are astrology, numerology, palm reading, personality types, and magic. Modern spiritual paths often blend western and eastern philosophies.

Studies revealed that many people choose their mate according to criteria that may not answer their soul's yearnings. Surveys conducted showed that most of the respondents who had been married for more than 15 years had married someone they did not consider to be a soulmate! This led to the conclusion that only a few newly wedded couples will find this sort of deep, "heaven sent" love in their marriages. Yes, you may call that a bummer!

Confusion about love is a human dilemma that has plagued people. In ancient times, oracles were consulted to aid parents in arranging marriages for their children. In modern times, authentic tools like Numerology, Astrology, Tarot and I-Ching reportedly help humans step outside ego-based emotions to gain clarity about the people and situations that matter most. As the infatuation wears off and as the challenges of daily life ask more of the relationship, one will be confronted with the question: Will your hearts collide in conflict or support each other in a lifetime of loving commitment?

The task now is to consciously propose a real-world definition for soulmates. Real-world soulmates are reportedly those in relationships who are both doing personal growth work in the face of challenges like the real-world upsets, the sensitivities, and human differences, problems or emotionally-charged issues. This only means that soulmates can either be lovers, bestfriends, siblings, relatives, peers or a combination of all these.

Becoming soulmates is the result of two people opening up even in the face of challenges in this dance of soulwork described as the courageous self-opening, expanding, and growing as a chosen response to challenges that close down on most people.

Doing soulwork enables one to succeed in building a partnership, a bonding, a kindred spirit connection - soulmates.

The challenge now is for you to strive to become a soulmate to others waiting for love personified! For your comments, reactions, suggestions, and contributions, crank up my addy: [email protected] or text me @ 09215323616. I'll dance with you in this soulwork to establish a kindred spirit connection.