Misheard

Keona, my niece, is starting to sing complete songs. Of course, considering her still-growing vocabulary, she doesn't always get the lyrics right. Recently, she picked up that song from the Ugly Betty trailer on Star World, The Show. There’s a part there that goes: “I want my money back. I want my money back.” And what does she sing? “I want my mommy back!”

This reminded yet again of the many lyrics my friends and I have misheard. I once thought the line, “Ocean deep, I'm so afraid to show my feelings. I have sailed a million ceilings in this solitary room” went “Oh Sandeep, I'm so afraid to show my feelings,” because I had an Indian classmate named Sandeep. My best friend Sherwil, on the other hand, thought the line from a Roxette song that goes, “She's so vulnerable, like china in my hands” actually said “She's so far away, like China in my eyes.”

The boy I used to love also commented, “Second year high school was my favorite year too” after hearing the FRIENDS theme's lines, “It's like you're always stuck in second gear when it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year.”

Here are other misheard lyrics, some I found online, some from my other brilliant friends.

Abba's “Dancing Queen.”

Real lyric: See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen.

Misheard lyric: See that girl, watch her scream, kicking the dancing queen.

BeeGees's “Staying Alive”

Real lyric: Stayin' alive, stayin' alive!

Misheard lyric: Steak and a knife, steak and a knife!

Toto's “Africa”

Real lyric: I bless the rains down in Africa.

Misheard lyric: I left my brains down in Africa.

BeeGees' “More than a Woman”

Real lyric: More than a woman... more than a woman to me.

Misheard lyric: Bald-headed woman... bald-headed woman to me.

Madonna's “Like a Virgin”

Real lyric: Like a virgin touched for the very first time.

Misheard lyric: Like a virgin touched for the thirty-first time.

Starship's “We Built This City”

Real lyric: We built this city on rock and roll.

Misheard lyric: We built this city on logs and coal.

R.E.M.'s “Losing My Religion”

Real lyric: That's me in the corner, That's me in the spotlight.

Misheard lyric: Let's pee in the corner, let's pee in the spotlight.

Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit”

Real lyric: Here we are now, entertain us.

Misheard lyric: Here we are now in containers.

Bon Jovi's “Living On A Prayer”

Real lyric: It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not.

Misheard lyric: It doesn't make a difference if we're naked or not.

Bob Dylan's “Blowing in the Wind”

Real lyric: The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind. The answer is blowin' in the wind.

Misheard lyric: The ants are my friends, they're blowin' in the wind. The ants are a-blowin' in the wind.

This is my favorite misheard lyric, though, courtesy of the ears of yours truly:

The Beatles' “Get Back”

Real lyric: Jo Jo was a man who thought he was a loner. But he knew it couldn't last!

Misheard lyric: Jo Jo was a man who thought he was a woman. But he knew it wouldn't last!

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