Of shortcuts & choices

With the many distractions that come our way every day, we no longer notice the passing of time and we find ourselves suddenly losing a day without knowing it.

I have become very introspective lately. Perhaps it is because I am of age. And I tend to evaluate the use of my time, my life in fact. Did I do something worthy of the spent hours?

Yet how does one evaluate what is valuable these days?

I used to think there were always better ways of doing things faster. Perhaps that is the reason why computers were invented and google was set up. To make information move faster. To waste less time on researches done and just move on with the data that we are able to retrieve. That is how we do things now in business. But there are many undocumented things that are just close to home. As we keep on searching for what we think is essential, we forget the very basic key to a shortcut is to listen and learn from the experiences of those within arm’s reach. Our grandparents, while they are still alive. Our parents who may also need to pause for a while to really communicate how the reach the point they are in so we do not fall into the same potholes.

The growing number of coffee shops should be inspiring. Because to share coffee before meant you also shared conversations. Yet you notice that in coffee shops, most are plugged into a lonely world of many people. How can that be?

You see all ages glued to their phones. They are with someone but they are with someone else or are somewhere else in gadgets. It is sad. In the world of connectivity, we find loneliness growing rampant and has in fact been among the causes of death. Depression, which may or may not have been caused by the lack of conversations. I can only surmise.

So yes, I place good conversations as one of the valuable ways of spending time. And let me qualify it with growth-building conversations. All geared towards improvement and not destruction. So, the Mariteses are out of the picture as they paint a twisted view of concern.

We find a whole encyclopedia of experiences from the people we meet. Both young and old.  Each one has something to say. Something substantial. An idea, a concept, an experience, that we can take to mean something even more valuable that what is presented upfront without the sheen of the many filters in social media.

Listening is a very important skill. It is here where wisdom grows. It is where the best shortcuts are found.

My grandparents used to tell me to save. To learn how to make better use of money and how to invest in the important. Of course, when you are young you tend to shrug these things off and be nonchalant ‘til you mature and see the importance of that wisdom. If you become wise early, you are able to build your treasures young and prepare steadily for those moments when you no longer have the strength to earn. If you do not listen enough, you end up cramming to prepare for retirement, or end up in a quandary of regrets. Choices.

Many want to live for the day. “Seize the day, and cease one day, if you are not careful”, I would tell my nephews and nieces who believe in YOLO (you only live once) and tattoo carpe diem on their bodies to remind them to just enjoy while they have the chance.

Don’t get me wrong. I would want us all to seize the moment. To live in it, in fact this is the very reason why I advocate for focus. To be there when you are with a friend. To listen well when you converse, and to express yourself truthfully, also hearing even what people cannot say verbally. To be more attentive to the moment. To be more conscious of the passing of time and making the most out of whatever you are doing and whoever you are with. Being there matters.

In the process, we will find many clues on what to avoid, what to adopt and adapt to, and what to reject.  Even when going about your business.

There are many gold nuggets in life. So many. We just have to pause sometimes to pick them up and pass them on.