I could not help but pondered for a moment when I read the headline of The FREEMAN “Kids at a loss when parents split,” as if my heart stopped beating for a while. I have seen the ugly faces of the effects of a broken home. My heart bleeds every time I hear or be a witness of a broken home. I feel sorry for the children who are victims of this disheartening and devastating situation.
In fact a teenage girl asked her grandma if she is not lovable because her parents separated. Another teenager ran away from home upon learning the separation of her parents.
It is so sad and sickening when homes become broken. The children are caught in the crossfire between their parents battle. They even thought that they are responsible for their parents’ divorce or separation.
I must confess that I have my own share of ups and downs in my marriage. But I never gave up because of my children. I believe that my life does not belong to me, but to my children. Since, I was already in the race I must reach the finish line, no matter what it costs. I am glad that I never gave up, until my husband expired 10 years ago. I finished the race without regrets.
The effects of a broken home can be devastating for the children. These are some of the negative impact on the children as cited by www.babygaga.com,:
•Health problems. If your kids are young, divorce could result in child suffering from health problems like frequent headaches. Asthma is also associated with parental divorce. It’s the psychological stress of the situation that could lead to the onset and suffering of asthma, and if your child already has asthma, it could aggravate the condition.
•Shyness. Shyness and lack of social skills is a common trait that kids from a broken home acquire. This is more common with kids who are caught in the middle of a messy divorce. This drastic change in your child’s life could cause your child to withdraw into his/her own shell. It may be due to the feelings of guilt and shame – your child finding a way to blame his/herself for the divorce – this could very well cause your child to develop a shy personality.
•Lack of self-confidence. Shyness and lack of self-confidence go hand in hand when it comes to describing feelings your child may experience as a result of a divorce.
•Suicidal thoughts. This one’s extreme, this one’s rare, but it is a possibility. Suicidal thoughts arise because of depression –kids who feel everything in life is going downhill, a situation they can’t envisage getting any better.
•Academic development. One of the most common negative effects of divorce on kids is that their schooling can be severely disrupted. They’ve got plenty of thoughts bouncing around in their little heads, negative feelings, worries, sadness, anxiety – you name it, they’re probably experiencing it at the time of divorce.
•Nightmares. Night terrors usually occur as a result of something that’s happening in our lives. Kids tend to suffer more nightmares than adults. Kids have a vivid imagination, lots of fears-whether they’re scared of the dark or a monster under the bed – parents splitting up can exacerbate these fears.