Here is a “Dear Cito” letter that I really need to share with all of you because it is a true story about tragedy, love, courage and determination. It is also a lesson and a promise that if we choose to believe, we achieve.
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I am Rubin Tan and one of your column’s avid fan. Your subject today prompted me to write this email to you as it brought back painful memories to me of something that happened to my family fourteen years ago which somehow was eerily similar to the bar exams tragedy. I don’t know how to express in words my own true feelings of what happened but anyway I’d like to try.
Fourteen years ago, my ten-year old daughter Kathryn figured in a tragic foundation day school fair accident at De La Salle Santiago Zobel School in Ayala Alabang Village on November 20,1996, which necessitated the amputation of her left arm. I am not sure if you were aware of this accident as it was headlined also in the papers at that time, but your account of last Sunday’s bar exams tragedy and your visit to Raissa Laurel was like déjà vu to me. I felt goose bumps all over me as I read your piece. Tears rolled out of my eyes as I watched on TV the anguish, emotional pain and the tears that her father showed because it was exactly the same reaction that I went through that fateful day. Signing the waiver to allow the doctors to amputate my daughter’s left arm in order to save her life was the most painful decision that I ever made in my life. I don’t know what kind of strong characters our girls seem to possess, but somehow they became stronger than ever after the accidents.
All throughout the events after the accident, my daughter remained calm and accepted her fate, though she felt the pain physically. However, she never cried one bit. She told us that it was God’s plan for her to do something good out of this misfortune. She did away with the psychologists’ trauma sessions saying they are just a waste of time for they could no longer bring her left arm back again. She assured them that she is okay vowing to become stronger than ever. She never became bitter, depressed or moped. Instead, she came out stronger and did whatever she could to thank God for giving her a second life and doing extraordinary things that no one thought she could ever do. She joined and was accepted in the girls basketball varsity champion teams in the elementary and high school, playing ball with only one arm and excelling at that. She represented Adidas Philippines in the “Impossible is Nothing” promo campaign in Dallas, Texas in 2005 where she was introduced to NBA basketball stars. They marveled and awed at her ability to play with only one arm. She finished college at De La Salle St. Benilde and today is working as a graphic artist.
One thing that I am most grateful and happy about these days is the kind of work that my daughter is doing. She gives inspirational and motivational talks whenever she could to athlete and student groups, urging them not to give up easily on failures or misfortunes but to rise up from these downfalls believing that as long as there is life there is hope. She would also like to tell Raissa to just believe and have faith in herself and always pray for God’s help and guidance.
I truly believe that Raissa Laurel has that same kind of special strong character that my daughter has. We really admire her and believe that she will come out of this unfortunate bump in her life stronger than ever and become a successful lawyer. We will always pray for her immediate healing and for her to achieve her dream in the near future.
Thank you very much.
Sincerely
Rubin Tan
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Without doubt, so many Filipinos here and abroad were affected by the tragedy that befell Raissa Laurel, the sophomore law student who lost both her legs from a bomb attack a week ago. As a result, there has been so much expression of encouragement, prayers and support for Raissa and her family.
What was not mentioned by many in media, is the concern of Raissa’s parents, Bob and Reggie Laurel, for the other victims of the bomb blast, who have received very little encouragement or help.
In a twist of irony, the victim that has the most damage is actually the one who is asking us to please turn our attention to the equally injured and hurting. In fact, it was much later when we learned that there was a second girl who lost one leg and is left with a badly damaged arm.
What many missed in the unfolding events is the reality that a number of those injured may not have the finances to cover such an unexpected medical cost or emergency.
I also received word that at least one of the victims with serious injuries was having great difficulty coping with her injuries, while another set of parents were equally stressed out from the trauma and financial burden.
As you read this article, may I ask you to do what I did last week, break out of your “normal” schedule or regular pattern. Go out and just visit one of those “unknown” victims, bring some candies or flowers, or just your goodwill. The trip may take longer than the visit, but remember the lesson:
“When did we do all this Lord? They asked.
And the Lord replied; when you fed the hungry, comforted the sick, visited the prisoner. When you did this for my children, you did it unto me”.