Dear China, Mai-Mai And Tingting,
I am 21 years old and I have a boyfriend who is 18. Some people criticize our relationship because I am older than him. His sister is just a year older than me, and I think she doesn’t like me. Other people’s comments about our age gap sometimes hurt me. Why is it that if an older guy falls for a younger girl, it’s okay? But if an older girl falls for a younger guy, it’s like an issue. Does it matter if I am older than the person I love?
Baby Bear
I think people frown on older girls having relationships with younger men because we believe that girls mature faster than boys. Therefore, if you’re already older in age, it is felt that there’s quite a disparity in maturity level. Maybe his sister is just worried that you’re putting her brother under your control. If this is the case, she is underestimating her brother. Although you don’t have to, try to prove to others that your boyfriend is happy with you too. If they see you both happy and see that your relationship is working, then maybe they will leave you alone.
China
I don’t know what the big deal is when 18 is just three years away from 21. People have pre-conceived nations about how relationships should be and these notions aren’t always right. It is actually up to you to show that age doesn’t really matter. If you really love this person and vice versa, then I don’t see why you should let loose talk affect you and your relationship.
Mai-Mai
In our country, the society dictates the norms. This is opposite the practice of people in other first world countries where the norm is usually to "live and let live." It could be that we have so much free time on our hands that we resort to rumor mongering and prejudging others. I think you should tell the others who impose their beliefs on you to mind their own business. As long as you’re single and you’re not stepping on anyone’s toes and you’re happy. I think you should pursue this relationship.
Tingting