I’m not a netizen. I’m a lurker and a stalker. I am a digital alien. But I’m not clueless to the massive and noble powers of the Internet nor am I benighted on the rampant digital abuses and online humiliation.
During my 16-day hospitalization, I was killed many times by various diseases via text messages, chismis and online gossip. Of course, I was aghast not being able to understand why anyone would do it. I had a liver problem. Doctors aspirated and drained 300 ml of abscess from my liver. I was alive (yes, I am alive!) and I was being given the best medical care by some of the best, most caring doctors of St. Luke’s Global. I wasn’t dead. Who were they talking about? Not me, so why bother.
One of the Internet sites had this eulogy, “Paalam po, Tito Boy. Ang tv host na si Boy Abunda kamakailan ay pumanaw na dahil sa sakit na colon cancer. Ito po ang dahilan kung bakit hindi siya nakikita sa kanyang mga palabas ng mga nakaraang linggo. Bago siya pumanaw ay nag-iwan siya ng tape. Ang hiling niya sa kanyang mga tagasubaybay ay sana ay panoorin ito. I-click n’yo lamang po ito para mapanood n’yo.” When you click the button, there’s a virus.
I am familiar with Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr and a couple of other stuff about the Internet. I don’t detach myself from the digital platform. I want to know what’s happening. I know when something on the Net is relevant to me and to my work. I refuse to go into the realm of bashing and hating. I am vehemently against online humiliation that has killed thousands of people around the world. Not that I don’t appreciate criticism, arguments, colliding opinions — but humiliation is an aberration of the freedom of speech.
I acknowledge the presence of people who maliciously do things on the Net to hurt others. Victims have remedies. One who is humiliated online can go to court if he has the time and resources, and if he can identify the culprits, he can confront the person/s personally or on the platform where the bullying happened.
I’m a media person. I have a platform — TV and print — and online accounts of staff and friends. I used these outlets to answer back and say that “you’re lying and you violated me. You ‘killed me.’ And what you did to me was wrong. I want you to know that. I want my public that got into their sites to know that what they did to me was cruel, inhuman and egregious.” I acknowledge them and then I stop. But am I legitimizing them? Am I dignifying them? I’m not “gonna” give them that. Then I move on.
And after some breathing exercises, I forgive all of them, just as I have been forgiven by people I have wronged in the past.
In Barbara Walter’s Master Class with Oprah Winfrey which I think is a TV classic, the last question was: Among all the things that you’ve learned in your life, what is the most important? Barbara quipped, “Forgive. Forgive yourself.” Because if you are able to forgive yourself, then you would be able to forgive others.
I have.