Is he the faithful husband, the ideal father, the God-centered artist that he has been painted/pictured to be?
Is he an exceptional being conceived, uh, without sin?
Gary V. himself is the first person who will readily admit that he’s not an angel. In short, he’s as human as anybody, so human that, even if he’s admittedly happily married (to Angeli Pangilinan with whom he has three children), when a beautiful/sexy woman passes by, he looks and entertains fleeting thoughts of obscenity.
"Every man faces temptation," admits "Father Gary," a Born-again Christian. "Even the greatest evangelist in the world faces temptation. But temptation is not a sin unless you give in to it."
Sins.
What could have been the "sins" that Gary V. has committed in his life, "sins" that he has perhaps never unload inside the confessional?
Quite a load, in case you want to know.
In the following Conversation, Gary V. launches into a true confession, sort of, starting with his being Dennis The Menace in school and ending with his "indiscretion" of getting his wife pregnant before they swapped "I do’s" at the altar.
What was your "original sin" as a child?
"You have to understand that after my brother, Robby, four girls came before me – Dian, Gina, Liza and Pia. Another girl, Gabin, came after me. Before Gabin was born, the world was mine. When she was born, my room went to her; I had to sleep in the sala. I made Gabin’s life miserable."
How?
"Oh, in many ways! Gabin, four years younger than me, had this beautiful doll from New York. Everytime we had an argument – we often had arguments – she would run inside her room and I would press my mouth in the hole where the doorknob used to be. At that time, ang dali-daling nasisira ang mga doorknobs. Now, when I shouted through that hole, Gabin would press her doll against it and it really pissed me off. You know what I did?"
I suspect I know.
"When Gabin wasn’t looking, I got a Pentel Pen and drew things on that beautiful doll’s face, that cute little doll which closed her eyes when you lay her down, with eyelashes so curly and so lovely. Of course, Gabin cried and cried when she saw the doll. I pretended that I didn’t know who the culprit was. When we recall that incident, my ‘original sin,’ we laugh and laugh. Eventually, of course, we grew up and we became the best of friends."
Were you nicer to your other sisters?
"In a way because they were not my ‘rivals.’ Pia, who’s from St. Paul’s, was the most radical in the family; she’s the comedienne in the family. She could come up with all excuses and alibis when she was caught going out at night or coming home late, or smoking."
Were you a little devil at home and a santo-santito in school?
"Hardly. In Grade 7, when I was 11 and not yet diagnosed as diabetic (It came when he was 14. – RFL), I started to smoke – inside the campus. My friends were smoking so I tried it, too. I was then in La Salle (Greenhills)."
Were you ever suspended in school?
"Oh, yes, I was, not for smoking but for breaking a locker. The lockers were made of wood. One big kick and they could be destroyed. But I must confess now that I never kicked a locker in La Salle; I never broke a locker. I happened to be magulo, the class clown, so when something naughty or mischievous happened, ako ang bini-blame."
So what happened to the locker?
"Nasira! Actually, I was sitting on top of the locker when an inspector passed by. He told me, ‘Bawal umupo on top of the locker.’ I said, ‘Why?’ He said, ‘You probably broke one of the lockers. You have to pay for it.’ To make a long story short, I was suspended for a day even if I didn’t break the locker. I want to make them know that I wasn’t guilty. I know who broke the locker. There were three of them." (Adding with a laugh) "If the La Salle authorities would like to know, I can tell them."
Did you ever cut classes?
"Never! Well, not in grade school. But in high school, I sometimes did. And also in college (still in La Salle). When I was in Grade 2, I used to tease a certain guy to death. I won’t mention his name because he’s still in the Philippines. Even now when I think about it, nagi-guilty ako. I would tease him and tease him so he started to avoid me."
Poor boy. I guess he never had a chance to get back at you.
"He wasn’t my only victim. There was this other guy with a funny name, may pagka-German siya. His name sounds so funny that when I tell my kids about his name, they laugh and laugh. His name sounded even more funny in the way I pronounced it. Again, I won’t tell you who he is because he might still be around. Anyway, at that time, uso sa campus ’yung paper bullets with rubber band. I was wondering, ‘Would that guy with a funny name look even funnier if I hit him with a paper bullet?’ So I hit him. When he started crying, I laughed because I saw that his funny name really fitted his face which looked very funny when he was crying."
What about your grades? Weren’t they affected by your naughtiness?
"I was an honor student when I reached Grade 2 because in Grade One, all my grades were above 90, only one was below 90 – sa Pilipino. But going back to the guy with the funny name…"
… what are his initials?
"Okay, his first name is Eric and his funny surname sounds like… yes, roller coaster. Anyway, if Eric with a funny surname is reading this, I want to extend my belated apology to him. I‘m sorry for what I did to you when we were in Grade 2 at La Salle (Greenhills)."
I hope the guy with a funny surname will accept your apology.
"The suntukan blues began when I was in Grade 3. That was the time I learned how to use my fist. I would fight all the time. I would fight with this guy whose last name was Magbuhat; I forgot his first name. Minsan provoked, minsan hindi. I would pick on guys I knew I could beat. Of course, sometimes I was punished. After recess or after lunch, while everybody was going up to the classrooms, I would be left squatting in the covered area."
Do you know what happened to that guy Magbuhat?
"I have no idea where he is now. But we did become good friends. In Grace 7, we went to Bacolod together as part of the La Salle team and we stayed in his grandparents’ house."
Any other "victims"?
"There was also Jojo Topacio, now a cartoonist and a good friend of mine, whose family owned the Big Mac burger outlet in Shopsville. Again, I was curious, ‘Let’s see nga if this guy really owns Big Mac and see how rich he is.’ I’d see Jojo eating a Big Mac sandwich during recess and I would sneak from behind him and flip the sandwich which usually fell to the floor. I’d suppress my laughter and pretend to say sorry. ‘Anyway, you own Big Mac. You can always get another sandwich and maybe get one for me, can’t you?’ But Jojo never got a free Big Mac for me. He’s the kind of guy who couldn’t be conned."
You once were an endorser of Jollibee, weren’t you? I’m sure Big Mac will never get you as an endorser.
"You know, one of these days I’m gonna see Jojo and bring him a box-ful of burgers to make up for all those burgers that I flipped out of his hands in school."
Was Jojo your, hopefully, last "victim?"
"Guess again. There was Dondon, too. If he’s reading this, he won’t probably believe that I remember an incident, also in grade school, where I did a painful prank on him. I asked Dondon, ‘Can I try something on you?’ And he said, ‘Why not?’ I said, ‘You’re sure it’s okay?’ And he said, ‘It’s okay!’ I was then wearing my brand-new leather boots and you know what I did? I stepped on this toe with the pointed heel of my boots!"
I bet you didn’t spare your teachers.
"I would copy and play around with my teachers, each and every one of them, to the T. I could copy how my teachers sounded, down to their Visayan accent, and I’d imitate the way they talked to the students. And then we would laugh, with the teachers clueless as to what we were laughing at."
How many times did you land in the Guidance Counsellor’s office? A lot, I suppose.
"I was able to make the Guidance Counsellor believe that I was not a loved child – you know, I didn’t have a room of my own anymore because my little sister got the room for herself, etc. My grades were getting worse and when my Mom learned about it, she screamed at me, ‘Edgardo Jose Santiago, what’s happening to you?’ I pretended to the Guidance Counsellor that I was an unloved child para maawa siya sa akin. Two weeks later, nabuko ako ng Mom ko, and that’s when she screamed at me."
What about the girls?
"I started really noticing the girls when I enrolled in third year high school in Florida. That was the time my Mom and Dad separated. Studying in an exclusive school here became too expensive for us; we were having financial difficulties, so my parents decided to sell our house in Greenhills and the money saw us through in the States. All of us kids went to the States. After only one year in a public school in Florida, I came back to La Salle and that’s when I began going to parties, to soirees. And to notice the girls. I had my first girlfriend when I was in third year high school, in La Salle."
Is she still around?
"No, she’s in the States, married. She was a nice girl, from Assumption. We still talk; my wife Angeli knows her. I was only 14 then. I courted her for eight months. I courted her through her brother who was my best friend who would sometimes invite me to sleep in their house."
Were you, you know, "careful" with the girls? Mahirap na, di ba?
"I’ve always been careful with the girls. When I was in fourth year, I experienced my first heartbreak. My first girlfriend split with me and it hurt me terribly. She didn’t like the fact that her family didn’t know that we were having a relationship. Two years later, she found a new boyfriend and it still hurt me."
And you?
"I found a second girlfriend, also from Assumption. Minahal ko rin ’yon ng matindi! Nasa college na ako noon. She also hurt me. She was very outgoing. I was already with the Kundirana (batch ‘82) then and I even wrote a song for her called Who’s Next in Line? (later recorded by Vicor Music Corp.)."
Didn’t you develop a phobia for girls?
"I didn’t, luckily. The tables were turned when I had my third girlfriend – siya naman ang nasaktan ko. I sort of misled her into thinking that we were sweethearts. She was from St. Paul’s and she needed a friend. She thought I had feelings other than friendship for her. After her, I hurt another girl, also from Assumption, whom I also misled into believing na mahal ko siya. After her, may nasaktan uli akong girl, from St. Scho naman. There was really something going between us, only for me to tell her, ‘Wala naman, a!’ It hurt her, so we broke up. All these were mistakes of an immature person and I feel sorry for them even now."
Have you ever taken advantage of the girls, any girl?
"Never! As a matter of fact, I suffered from a lot of insecurities that’s why I became the class clown. That was my shield, my defense mechanism. I was afraid of rejection; I was afraid that people wouldn’t take me seriously and would simply categorize me as either totoy na totoy or immature."
When did you have your first kiss and your first intimate encounter with a girl?
(Thinking, hesitating, mumbling and then blushing) "It’s too private for me to discuss it in public."
Anyway, would you say with a straight face that you were pure and chaste when you (and Angeli) faced the altar?
(Without batting an eyelash) "Well, you can say that."
But didn’t Angeli get pregnant (with Paolo) before you got married?
"That was a big… I mean… You know, I look at the mirror and I scold myself, ‘If there was one mistake that you should have avoided, that you should have known the consequences of, it’s this.’ There was a big media fuss about it (in the early mid ’80s), remember? It was a sin, I know, and I have admitted that, even to my son."
Were you (and Angeli) "absolved" of that "sin" when you eventually got married?
"I guess so. It kind of erased the ‘sin’, especially when Paolo was born."
Did you feel guilty about that pre-marital indiscretion?
"Oh yes, I did. When Angeli and I were at the altar, there were moments when I would look back at my friend Tats Faustino and I would have tears in my eyes. I was like saying, ‘This is it. I’m going into a new world. I’m leaving you behind.’ That was in 1984, two years after school. I was only starting in showbiz then."
Didn’t you, or Angeli, consider anything, you know, "drastic"?
"Dropping the baby, you mean? No, we never thought of that. But Angeli did think of ending her life because of the media controversy, but it was a fleeting thought. She was worried for me because I was then about to stage my first concert but I assured her, ‘I’m okay; don’t worry.’ Well, we survived that crucial period."
How did you handle Felichi, Angeli’s younger sister, who was your girlfriend (before Angeli)?
"Felichi was the fourth girl that I hurt. Yes, I did apologize to her, I told her, ‘I’m sorry, this has to happen.’ At that time, there was tension between the Pangilinan family and me. Quietly, she told me, ‘You’ll always be my friend. It’s all right. It may take time for me to adjust to it, but…’ I knew that she was very angry. Natural lang ’yon. Years later when Felichi got married, she said she wanted to say sorry to me. I asked her, ‘Why?’ She said, ‘Because I harbored a lot of bitterness inside me. I’m getting married and starting a new life, so I want to start with a clean slate.’ How nice of her, ‘no."
Finally, you’ve let it off your chest after all these years.
"I’m still not an angel because of the little bumps and bruises caused by the mistakes and the ‘sins’ I’ve done. But I’ve become definitely a better person because of my relationship with The Lord."
(Praise be!)